The Keys to a Fulfilling Life with Dr. John Demartini

Dr. John Demartini is a polymath and a world-renowned human behavior expert. He has over 4 decades of research across multiple disciplines. His work has been described by students as the “most comprehensive body of work”, “an extensive library of wisdom” and “wisdom of the highest and most valuable order”

Dr. Demartini’s mission and vision is to share knowledge and wisdom that empowers you to become a master of your own life and destiny.

He’s an internationally published author, a global educator and the founder of the Demartini Method, a revolutionary tool in modern psychology.

His education curriculum ranges from personal growth seminars to corporate empowerment programs. He shares life, business, financial, relationship and leadership empowerment strategies and empowerment tools that have stood the test of time.

Dr. Demartini has studied over 30,000 books across all the defined academic disciplines and has synthesized the wisdom of the ages which he shares online and on stage to over 100 countries.

His presentations whether keynotes, seminars or workshops, leave clients with insights into their behavior and the keys to completely transform their lives.

His signature program The Breakthrough Experience has been delivered in 64 countries to over 100000 students to date.

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Follow Along with the Transcript – Episode 046

Alex Ferrari 0:09
I'd like to welcome to the show, Dr. John Demartini. How you doing, John?

Dr. John Demartini 0:13
I'm doing great. Thank you for having me on your show.

Alex Ferrari 0:15
Thank you so much for having for coming on the show. I truly appreciate it. I've been a fan of yours for a while. We were talking a little bit earlier, that first time I was introduced to you was watching that little documentary that little independent documentary no one ever saw called The Secret.

Dr. John Demartini 0:31
Yeah, that goes back aways now. That seemed to spread quite a bit across the world. So I got some mileage out of being part of that. So I'm very grateful.

Alex Ferrari 0:41
Absolutely. So my first question to you, sir, is how did you start your journey helping other people.

Dr. John Demartini 0:48
I was a surfer in Hawaii, on the North Shore of Oahu. And I went over there at age 15. I was surfing there till almost well, almost 18. And right before my 18th birthday, I had a close brush with almost dying, surfing, concern and also some other reasons. And that led me in a recovery that to a health food store into a yoga class, and a meditation class where a guest speaker named Paul C, Bragg was there. And this one gentleman in one hour one night inspired me to believe that I could overcome my learning challenges. Because I had dropped out of school and I was I had learning and reading issues I couldn't read. And that night, I had a dream to overcome that, and to someday be intelligent. And that night, I when I thought of intelligence, when you're 17 years old, and think of intelligence, it could somehow a teacher or something, Professor something. And so that was the night I had sort of an a visionary epiphany of what I wanted to do. And I had a dream to be a teacher, and I wanted to travel the world. And so I started on my journey, which led me back to taking a GED, which is a high school equivalency, and then eventually going back and passing that and going into school with the help of reading dictionaries, because I had to memorize words and things because I was lost on reading, eventually passing and eventually doing well and eventually becoming a scholar, and going on in to be a doctor and I started my speaking career at age 18. And my first student started at 18. Somebody want to listen to me wanted me to teach them yoga, because I learned about yoga. And I started gathering students. By the time I was 20, I was having 100 250 students a day under the trees gathering, sometimes 400. By the time I was in professional school, I was teaching seven days a week. And it went from there to the city, to a television show to newspapers, you name it. And it just kept growing, went to the same city, the state nation, I think I've now spoken, probably around 170 countries now I think it's right at that work. And I never stopped on my dream that I started when I was 17. And I'm now 50 years later, I'm in my 50th year of teaching now, and I'm going on 68 I'm still doing it. And I can't think of anything else I'd rather be doing just what I love doing. This is why I've delegated everything else off my plate. So I don't have to do anything but teach research and write. I don't I haven't driven a car in 32 years I haven't cooked since I was 24 I anything that did not inspire me that I wanted to delegate I found a way of delegating it, and sticking to what I love doing. And so I do this every day of my life. And this is what this is what I do. I'm so grateful that that day on the North Shore, spurred what I get to do today.

Alex Ferrari 4:06
Now I have to ask you, you've you've spoken to so many people and you've taught so much over the course of your life. There is a a feeling when you give back to people what does that been like for someone like yourself who's been doing it for now going on 50 years of the constant helping and transforming people's lives and and can you tell the audience what value of giving has done to your life?

Dr. John Demartini 4:35
Well, I was born on Thanksgiving Day. And my mom told me when I was four put me to sleep she said make sure you count your blessings those that are grateful for what you have you get more to be grateful for every single day of my life. I have a gratitude journal that I keep of what I get to do. And in there are 1000s of I mean, probably hundreds of 1000s of thank you letters that I get that bring tears to my eyes. And that's probably the most meaningful thing. I mean, when I asked people as I traveled, how many of you have moment go to the moment you've had the most fulfillment life? You have tears of gratitude. And most people, when we asked, What are we doing at that moment, we're doing something that contribute to somebody else's life, and we're getting appreciated for it. So I work on that every day, trying to be of contribution. I've created a little affirmation in my head, I create original ideas that serve humanity. And I tried to persevere in researching and teaching and so I have something contributed every day. And that thank you letters that I get around the world are tear jerking. So I, I get to do things that inspire me and brings tears of gratitude, and I get to receive things that bring gratitude pretty well, every day, I believe that I've got the largest collection of, of gratitude to anybody I've ever met in my life, I have 33 volumes. And that's 1000s and 1000s, of pages of gratitude. And believe or not, I've got your podcast already in there this morning. I just typed it in for the opportunity to, to do it, I could show it to you, if you if you'd like and I

Alex Ferrari 6:22
believe you I believe you 100% That's amazing. I'm glad that I've made I've made the journals.

Dr. John Demartini 6:30
Well, if I go in there and I, I go in, I had the opportunity to be interviewed by yourself, and to be able to contribute and share with his audience. And so I document whatever I get to do on the database, because I I'm a firm believer in setting clear objectives and metric thing them daily, to refine the actions to achieve. And those I so I keep a record of every podcast, every newspaper, every rep radio show, every you know, every film I've gotten to do I keep records of everything, to see that if I say I have an intention, do I really live up to my walk in my talk. And that is a great way of offering feedback. But it also I get the win of seeing that I'm doing it. So there's integrity, but also gratitude because I get to do that have those experiences. I've gotten to meet amazing people all over the world that do amazing things because of that journey. So I got a pretty good deal right now I'm I'm literally halfway between Tahiti, and Ecuador sailing in a very remote remote part of the Pacific Island Pacific Ocean. On my ship. So and I'm I just got through doing a Polynesian journey through a whole bunch of atolls and islands there. So I got a pretty great for life. I can't complain.

Alex Ferrari 7:53
I mean, someone's got to live it. I mean, I mean seriously.

Dr. John Demartini 7:59
Well, I'm a firm believer that I set out when I was 18 years old. I was watching a little TV show called kung fu. William Verdi walk Yeah. And and this Shaolin Temple Master, you know, that guided him and stuff. And he was this fictitious picture guy that always kind of taught principles as he went, like, I really identify with that guy back then. And I was doing yoga at the time, and the show was on in 1973. And he mentioned the word Master, master. And I thought, I love that word. So I wrote that word down. And I made a decision that I wanted to master my life. I didn't know what that really meant. But it just sounded cool. It's like the Master of the Universe kind of thing. And so then I decided, I'm going to formalize that, I'm going to find what that means to me. So I broke life into our spiritual quest, our intellectual quest or mind development, our career quest, or financial quest, or family, relationship, quest, or social influence quest, or physical fitness clubs. And I started defining how I would love if I had a magic wand, how I would love that life to be. And I sent that I want to create original ideas that serve humanity. I want to create a wake up my genius, wake up my innovate and create and do something that's never been done on the planet. I want to create a global business, I want to have financial independence. And I went around the thing and what I wanted to do, I want to have a global family I wanted to live around the world. My ship is called the world. I, I wanted to have social influence and meet the most amazing people that had global influence. I wanted to be physically fit and vital, ripened age. I think I'm doing pretty good for 68 of us and be inspired and contribute to something that's a movement of inspiration. And I wrote all that down. And then I said all right, what is the highest priority action I can do today that can move me One step closer to this reality. And I kept sticking to priority actions, and documenting what worked and what didn't work, and how do I do it more effectively and efficiently tomorrow? And whatever happened? How does that help me get one step closer? And how do I get renumerated for doing it so I could do what I love and love what I do, and not have a schizophrenic life forever, Monday morning, blue Wednesday, hump day, thank God, it's Friday and a week friggin in kind of existence, I want to be able to do what I love and love what I do and get handsomely paid for it. So I could exemplify a prioritized life without having to do something that was uninspiring. And so I worked on that. And I mapped that in a pretty diligent about that. And then I tried to share that with other people. So people who would love to do that, whatever that is, or maybe some portions of that, to show them how they can become financially dependent, how they can grow their business to whatever scale they want, how they can wake up their intellectual capacities, or be inspired or whatever. I love helping people. Because I've been researching those topics for all these years.

Alex Ferrari 11:03
So you know, I read in your bio, that you read over 30,000 books, and I'm assuming, in those in those studies, you've gone down the spiritual path, and probably read some of the great masters and spiritual works in History Throughout human history. You spoke about the spiritual quest, I feel that so many people in today's world are detached from the spiritual aspects of their lives, and they only focus on the money, or they only focus on the physical, or they only focus on one of those areas that you're talking. And they're not as well rounded. Can you talk a little bit about what a spiritual quest is, in your definition? And how can people find what that spiritual quest is for themselves?

Dr. John Demartini 11:44
I'll do that in reverse, because you kind of had to two questions are what it is, and how do you find it. Every human being, regardless of age, or culture or spectrum of gender, lives moment by moment by a set of priorities, set of values, things that are most to least important in their life. And whatever is in that hierarchy of values that they have. Whatever is highest, is an intrinsic value. That means that they are spontaneously inspired from within to fulfill it. And no extrinsic motivation is required to get them to do it. There's no reward if they do it no punishment if they don't mentality. It's just a spontaneous fluid action towards that objective. There is a thing in the brain called spontaneous potentials burst evoked potentials, evoked potentials, extrinsically, driven and spontaneous ones are intrinsically called. So whatever that is, prioritizing your actions to fulfill that is the most fulfilling mission that a person could do and individual can do. Because our identity, our ontological identity revolves around what we value most. For instance, if you have a mother, who's has three beautiful children under the age of five, and they're 35 years old at sight, and their total focus is raising these beautiful children. If you asked that woman, what it is that you feel, you know, is your identity. She'll say, I'm a mother of a dedicated mother. If you meet a person who's got three companies, and said three children, and they're a serial entrepreneur, even though they may have three children, but that's their highest value is being an entrepreneur. And you asked him who are you? They may not say Father, they probably say I'm an entrepreneur sealer on printer, businessman or woman, if their highest value is fitness and yoga, I have a yoga fitness instructor with me. And you know, their highest value is the mastery of body and the mastery of of fitness, right? And you ask them, even though they may have children, or they may have a business somewhere else, they still identify themselves. I'm a yogi, or I'm a fitness specialist. Your identity revolves around what you value most. And your epistemological pursuit of knowledge revolves around what you value most. And you're telling you a logical purpose revolves around what you value most. So that's the first step is identifying what is really truly YOUR LIFE demonstrating is intrinsically called for you to do. It's a feeling that it's, I mean, nobody has to remind me to teach i This is what I love doing. I do it every single day I go to bed with it, think about it, it's my love. So, finding that is the key to a mission for life. Aristotle called that highest value the telos, which is the end in mind, which is the primary objective or chief aim by Napoleon Hill. And the study of that was called teleology, which is the study of meaning and purpose. So the most meaningful the most fulfilling the most inspiring the most purposeful thing an individual could do is to pursue and fulfill what is truly most intrinsically called And then you know, valuable to that individual. So that is the purposeful path. But it is also a spontaneous inspire, where you have the greatest gratitude because in that area, whenever you go and pursue that the blood glucose notched and according to functional MRIs goes into the executive center, and awakens the executive function, which is inspired visions, strategic planning, executing plans with precision, and self governance, which means to calm down the amygdala is impulses and instincts, which normally distract people from being present focused. And that is also what you feel is your spiritual path. Nobody is more spiritual or less spiritual than anybody else. But they feel more fulfilled. Pleroma key Well, if there is a Gnostic said, when they're pursuing what is deeply meaningful to them. So the mother, her spiritual path is raising a beautiful family to the yogi it may be meditating and doing yoga postures to the mystic, it may be contemplating the universe, to a business individual, it may be creating a massive amount of service to the world efficiently. Whatever that is, that's their spiritual quest, what inspires them, what is meaningful, and that contributes into the great matrix that people love in life. And to me, I don't want to box spirituality and date into a religious dogma, of course, an institutional structure, but into a plethora of possibilities based on what truly inspires the individual to express and to come to contribute to the planet. Is that

Alex Ferrari 16:35
why? When like a parent, because I'm a parent, and one day my children will leave the nest per se, that syndrome, that when you have identified as the mother or the father, and that's your whole life, and when that part of your life leaves you because they have to go off and live their own lives. You feel there's there's a breakdown because you're like, wait a minute, I don't even know who I am. Or if you focus on career, and you lose your job that you've been working on for 20 years. And that's all you've ever identified as your entire world comes crashing down. Or if it's entrepreneurialship, and your business goes under, and you've lost everything now. Well, I don't I can't identify. You know, I remember growing up, I identified as a filmmaker, as a director, that was my career. And that's all I identified myself as that was the one thing I wasn't multifaceted at all, I think your approach is excellent, because you are, you know, your your variety of all these different things. But there is that one thing that you really are going towards, but out of all of the things you said the spiritual is the only one that really, I mean, maybe you could tell me different, doesn't fall away. Like you can't lose your spirit. I don't know. I mean, maybe you can lose your spirituality. That's a certain point, like the yogi or something like that. But all the other ones are based in the material world almost and based around things you love in the material world, which is fine, because we live in a material world. But I find that the spiritual is the one place that you find the ultimate true fulfillment as you get older. And in life. This is just me talk. I'd love to hear your opinion on that.

Dr. John Demartini 18:15
You know, I get asked by various organizations, I mean, I've been blessed to speak to governments, to corporations to spiritual industries, and spiritual Institute's. I've met many spiritual leaders, I met the bump a lama, the Dalai Lama, Pope, you know, gurus, mystics, have met all kinds of people. Sure. And what I've been blessed to do is to try to ground it. Because I don't want to dissociate human beings from their physical with their metaphysical, I want to put them together. And so I'd like to share this, this is something I shared the other day that I thought was useful. We have an authentic self, where we're poised and present. And we're inspired and grateful graced, and we have equanimity. And then we also have a inauthentic self, where we can exaggerate ourselves and puff ourselves up with pride, or minimize ourselves and deflate ourselves with shame. When somebody challenges our values, we tend to inflate ourselves. When somebody supports us, we tend to humble ourselves. So if we meet somebody that we perceive consciously that supports us more than challenges us, and we're conscious of the upsides more than the downsides that we can become infatuated with them and minimize ourselves to them. And we can inject their values into our life and sacrifice what's important to us to be with them altruistically. We can also have somebody challenge our values and we'll put them down in a pit and exaggerate ourselves. We'll be too proud to admit what we see in them inside us. And then we'll project our values onto them and try to get them to live in our values which is futile. So we can exaggerate or minimize ourselves. In either case, when we exaggerate ourselves and we get almost a narcissistic expectation others are supposed to live in our values and project our values on, we will lose customers, we will lose respect from employees as pride before the fall, just to humble us to get us back into authenticity. If we sit there and sacrifice for others will sacrifice our profits, and we'll have anarchy in our in our organization, until eventually go Darn it, I deserve more than this. And we'll lift our self back up into authenticity. So there's a feedback, homeostatic feedback loop, trying to take us from our exaggerated and minimize selves into our authentic self. I really believe that our physiology psychology, our business or sociology, are always offering feedback mechanisms towards our authenticity. But the moment we bring those into equilibrium, and have equanimity, and have sustainable, fair exchange with somebody else, because now we have equity, we now want to do business with them. And they want to do business with us. And we have sustainable prosperity. That's potential, a stable business, not a volatile one. And equanimity and authenticity, which is our spiritual path. So I believe that the material world of business is actually a mechanism to help people fulfill their spiritual authenticity, which is a path of inspiration of contribution in sustainable fair exchange in a way that is deeply meaningful to them. Money with meaning leads to philanthropy, the love of humanity, money without meaning tends to lead to debauchery, which is an impulse, avoidance of challenge and a seeking of immediate gratification. So I really believe that the spiritual path can be manifested in every area of our life. And all those areas of life are offering feedbacks to help us become inspired by our real deeply called mission. And that mission can change. You know, your your identity, you can go through identity crisis and blessings and have adjustments to your mission based on your children growing up

COVID, anything could make those cataclysmic changes or micro changes, slow, gradual changes. But whatever it is, your life's journey is a summation of all those destinies, and the heart of your values is dictating those destinies. And your mission is an ongoing, maybe one single path or it may be a variety of paths that lead to an overall journey that is the path for that individual. And I think that that finding what that is and identifying what's deeply meaningful and prioritizing your life on a daily basis, is one of the most efficient things we can do to have the most fulfilling life. We can live by design or we can live by duty. subordinating as part of the herd is Ernest Becker described in his denial of death, Pulitzer Prize winning book, many people subordinate to the herd, and then don't get heard. Instead of actually walking the misfit life, the unbar visionaries life of the path, which is authentic, and allowing themselves to be the individual hero, and to brace both sides of their own life. Many people are trying to compare themselves to others, instead of comparing their daily actions to what they value most, and give themselves permission to live by priority, and congruent, where they're inspired and grateful, and that is their spiritual expression. So I don't want to put spiritual expression as too abstract, more, too, you know, too mystical or too distant, because I believe we can ground it into a very grateful life, doing something that contributes in a sustainable way, and have gratitude and have thankfulness in in our contribution and our opportunity to be of service.

Alex Ferrari 23:43
It's so funny that you say the word authenticity, because it's something that I found in my work. People are attracted to authenticity, they are attracted to real, because there's so much fake and so much puffing up in social media, so puffed up in everything, even in life. People are attracted to authentic people, people who are attracted to those misfits, the ones that walk their own path, not the one that walks with the herd. And yet, society is constantly telling you walk in the herd, it starts in school, you know, in in here in the States, this kind of schooling that we have here, it's all very, the bell rings, you do what you're told, if you, you do this, you do that. And if you step out of line, they try to push you right back into the herd. I had a couple of issues growing up. I'm not being part of that heard. But I found that authenticity is what people really are attracted to. But yet people are so afraid of embracing their authenticity, they embrace that secret sauce, that is theirs, and there's only there is no other. You know, there's no other John in the world. There's no other athletes in the world. What we have is very specific to us. And when we allow it to shine is where so much success happens for our lives in the material world. And also in the spiritual world, would you agree,

Dr. John Demartini 25:03
giving yourself permission to shine not shrink, to radiate not just gravitate, and to walk a path of an unbar visionary instead of a borrowed vision is the unique path that the one who contributes and causes transformation in the world, otherwise we have stagnation. So the innovators in life, you won't innovate, if you're subordinate, you will only innovate when you coordinate. If your sub superordinate, looking down on people, you'll be distracted with utility trying to get other people to be like you. If you subordinate, you'll be distracted with utility trying to be like somebody else. But if you ornate and honor the wisdom in them for their uniqueness according to their highest values, and they honor the wisdom in you, and share your wisdom with others, you both contribute. That's called a productivity cycle. It's a nonzero sum game contribution cycle. That that is what is the one that opens the doorways of opportunity, then, in my observation, so I do my best. And everything that I'm involved in teaching is to help awaken that. Now, not everybody is asking for that. And I don't impose that on somebody because I don't find that productive. But to those who believe no proof is necessary to those who don't know, proof is possible wasting the words on those who seek not as the old proverbs. So I just share with those people who are interested in hearing it. And if they would like to learn more that I'm available, if they don't, fantastic, everybody is on their journey, I still believe there's a higher order in the apparent chaos, and that no matter what's going on in the world, or in life, even the crazies that people are talking about right now. There's still a higher order to it. I had this discussion with some scholars yesterday, about this thing that's going on in Russia and Ukraine and stuff. And they had completely opposing views on it. It was quite interesting watch. And they, I, they turned to me at the end, and they saw John, what do you what do you what side are you on? And I said, I'm not on a side. They said, What do you mean, you're not on a side. And I said, I see two subjectively biased individuals projecting their wounds onto this discussion. And I'm not wounded by these two, these two things. So I don't react in this situation. And I said, I can see the pros and cons of both your views. So I pointed out the pros and cons, the pros and cons. And I said, I'd rather be objective. Because if you take a stance, and you take a stance, you're victims of circumstance, and you're not going to get anywhere, you're not going to have a dialectic, you're going to have a debate, that dialectic will lead to a synthesis and a greater awareness, the debate will just lead to two people with two opinions. And I said, so I see the benefits and drawbacks of both sides. And I choose not to be attached to either one of those. And they were like quieted by that. But they were like, secretly came up one after one and wanted to still try to convince me and I said, I'm not here to be convinced of a side. Because that's a subjective bias. I'm interested in seeing the whole. And so that was where I left it. So I'm a firm believer that there's a there's a hidden order. If you study chaos, and you study disorder, and you study Claude Shannon's work on information theory, you'll see something really amazing. You'll see that disorder just means missing information. entropy means missing information, the tendency to go towards disorder, which means the tendency to have unconsciousness, and ignorance about the hole. But if we know how to ask quality questions that wake up our unconscious to make us fully conscious, we can see a hole which automatically brings a great state of grace to us. And we realize there's nothing to fix. There's something to honor, and something to be appreciative of. And I choose not to, not to react to the sides, I choose to ask news questions to make sure I see the hole and not stop until I see something I'm grateful for. And then I don't have to do anything except thank and the person that's there I find draws people to them that magnetizes people to like you said, people are interested in authenticity, they're not interested in opinions.

Alex Ferrari 29:19
Now you I mean, obviously, you've been around for a few years, and you've seen how society in general has changed. I feel like the consciousness even in my life has changed so radically from when you were 18 doing yoga, which I'm sure a lot of people look at you strange during those years of like yoga like what is that meditation? What is that? And now it's a very common thing. I feel that the consciousness is of humanity is growing. But we are in a weird time that there's so much disorder so much kind of shaking of the paradigm of what we what we have used been used to With the war now with, you know, global warming and the weird weather that we're having political strife COVID, so much of this stuff is happening. There's obviously something happening to the world, because now we're all fake, we're all feeling it at the same time. In a weird way, I've never seen anything like that in my lifetime. Or I honestly in history where the entire planet is going through COVID At the same time, the entire planet is going through these weird weather patterns and what's going on? What's your opinion on the consciousness of humanity? And and what's your opinion on what's going on? In the world right now, just as a general shake up of the world?

Dr. John Demartini 30:43
Well, we have governance over three things in our life, our perceptions, decisions and actions. Right. And it's not what's out there. It's our perceptions of what's out there. And if we react is because we have incomplete information, if we act out of appreciation loves because we're now more of a hole in our awareness. There is a thing called a Global Peace Index. And 99.7% of the world's population is encompassed in it. And it's an institution that basically measures the degree of criteria that they determined conflict and peace, cooperation, competition, etc, globally. And most countries are in it. Not all there's a few that have not been factored in, but most of them are. And I've been watching that for a long time. And regardless of what anybody says, the data is there. And peace and warming, gain balance.

And so if we look at localized conflict, and don't look at the company, compensations, as Emerson say to it, will react. But if we look at where it's going on, for instance, Ukraine right now is getting, you know, challenge, but it's also getting massive support, and challenge and support, destruction, construction, destroy, build, whatever, these are the major part of transformation, evolution to transformation. Your body has the sympathetic nervous system, which is catabolic, and the Paris of the nervous which is anabolic, one builds it undergoes reduction, the other one oxidation, it destroys prey builds anabolic, predator, destruction, catabolic. And we have to have both of those in a metabolic equilibrium for us to adapt to a changing environment and to constantly evolve. And just like a living organism does that the collective organism society, and the world itself has demonstrated this a self organizing system that is balanced in that perspective. If we look for the answer to where's the other side, instead of just reacting with a misperception, and we then impulsively go and rescue or instinctively avoid and label with subjective biases, we actually see the the living intelligence that's greater than our reactions, undergoing its job of transformation. What we think is terrible a day, a week, a month, a year, five years later, we're going to say thank you. But why have the wisdom the agents with the aging process, you can have the wisdom the agents about it by asking the right questions? So I don't choose to watch social media and you know, the television version because they are designed I've been on enough television, I've been on 9000 shows. I've been on television know that that's sensationalism, most Sure. They exaggerate, get opinion and they draw opinions and people get to talk and that's what sells commercialism. I'm not interested in mass media. I'm interested in master awareness. And so I look at the Global Peace Index, I watch the factors I look at the world for whatever's going on where the opposites are, I look for complementary opposites. I look for the law of artistic escalation, which anytime in chaos theory something comes in the teak one opposite will be born Heraclitus it century BC talked about these complementary pairs of opposites permitted, he said the same thing but Tigris approach this the same way. Aristotle did it Zeno. All the great minds through the ages have referred to these pairs of opposites. But for some reason, mass consciousness chooses to see one side without the other and have a subjective bias and let the external world extrinsically drive them towards or away from things instead of look deeper, broader, and actually have that spiritual awareness. A broad mind sees neither good nor evil, a narrow mind sees either good or evil. So I choose to widen my mind. see both sides, act not react and inform people about to calm down the reaction so they can understand a bigger broader game. What's on on the planet. When we do we don't see the chaos. Chaos is missing information. We see the chaos We participate in it, we react, and somebody of the equal and opposite nature will react in the opposite way to keep things in balance. So I'm about asking the right question, quite a lot, especially quite a question to ask. Aristotle said that excess and deficiency with the biases and the golden mean was the virtue. And so if you can see the thing you think, access and find the downsides, and the thing you think is deficient, find the upsides and become conscious of both sides, you can come to the golden mean. And the golden mean is the spiritual quest of love in life, which is the pair of opposites synthesized. So I'm a firm believer and asking those questions. And frankly, I am doing that right now in our daily life. And as a result of it, I'm able to stay poised amongst the so called poison. But don't be fooled by outer appearances. I have people come to me all the time, and they want to become victims of history and not masters of destiny. And they want to run their story about how they've had these challenges. My mother wasn't there for this, this wasn't happening or that. And I said, when your mother wasn't there, who became your mother? What do you mean? What did you think you missed in your mother? Well, affection intention, who gave you affection attention? Oh, my teacher or my best friend's mother? Oh, yeah, the girlfriend? What was the benefit of them doing it? And what would been the drawback of the mom doing it? Because you have a fantasy life would have been happier, what have been the drawback of that? And I helped them ask a new set of questions. And all of a sudden they realize nothing's missing. I was in Nepal with the bump Obama, we had a conversation about the idea that nothing's missing. It's only missing in our awareness, because we're not asking the right question, becoming cognizant of the unconscious. And so I'm a firm believer of looking deeper and broader and opening the mind to a higher order that's going on. There's a wisdom, that's a matrix of wisdom that's going on that we don't always take time to look and acknowledge. And if you do, you'll be grateful every day.

Alex Ferrari 36:54
I find it really fascinating the concept of the balance, when there's a great evil, a great good comes up or when there's a great good some other VAT, something's always balancing. You're in your own life, and also on a micro level and on a macro level around the world. And it's really interesting. So then, in many ways, some of the things that are happening in the world today, could be counterbalanced with all the good and I think what you said was interesting, like the Ukraine is going through a lot right now. But they may have never seen the mass of support that I just never seen in my lifetime,

Dr. John Demartini 37:30
subsides, as one subside some of the other as one it's called the law of artistic escalation, if you want to study that. A lot of artistic escalation eras was discord and cut. And so if you raise up disorder, and Sue order ensues, if you raise up order disorder and says, if a government tries to impose a new rule, a sanction disorder occurs, if all of a sudden disorder occurs, order tries to come. And then they both rise together. They're both subjective biases and interpretations of reality. But the idea of the good and evil this is another thing that we have. If we look at our amygdala, which is a subcortical area of our brain, it has a nucleus accumbens for pleasure, and it has a striatum and another area for pain. And so these two areas are involved in seeking prey and Predator. So it's a survival desire center, that's that location. But it's also governed from above from the executive function, which is a medial prefrontal cortex, and it governs and mitigates and calms down and dampens the volatilities of that reactor. And most people are caught in reaction and believe it or not, this is going to shock people but morality comes from that reactionary center, not the executive center. Morality isn't a is a subjective bias interpretation of our existence. We label something good only when we don't see the downsides. We label something bad only when we don't see the upsides. And one person's Heaven is another person's hell, as John Milton said. But the fact is that it's neither. It's neither. Until somebody with a narrowed mine labels at touch. I was involved in in mediating a conflict between five Israeli leaders and three Palestinian leaders. And I had the first moment I walked in there, the one of the Israeli leaders put their hand up and said, Dr. Demartini, I have a question for you before we begin this, so do you believe in absolute evil, and I said, No? Well, I do. And I said, Is it possible? That's why for 14 years, you've been trying to mediate something and got nowhere. Because what you're considering evil, you're trying to change. You're trying to get somebody else to live in your values. And if you do, you will get nowhere. They calm down for a second. And I then turned him I said, What do you call absolute evil, and they sit in tolerance. Now, it was very obvious that they were being intolerant at the time, but they were blind to their own reality. And we only judge other people when they remind us of parts of ourselves we haven't loved and have an integrated didn't own in our lives. And that's as old as we can trace in history that's been known. So I said, So you're saying intolerance? Is it? Okay, great. I said, now go to a moment when you've been intolerant your life. I've never been tolerant. I pride myself. I've never been intolerant. I'm very tolerant. Everybody I know, knows I'm intolerant. I would never be intolerant. I'm always tolerant. And I said, Well, that's interesting, because I look at my life. And I have all sides. I have moments of tolerance and moments of intolerance. Let me give you some of my intolerances. I've been intolerance at airports have an intolerance and read in hotels, I've been intolerance with food and restaurant intolerance with salespeople. Ben Thompson, my girlfriend, my kids, my dad, and I listed about 50, intolerances, bam, to broaden her perspective of where her intolerances were. And then she goes, Oh, she said, Okay. And I said, Now let's go to a moment when you've been intolerant. She started listing it go the next moment, listed it. And I made her do 39 examples of intolerance until she humbled herself, had a tear come out of her eye, and realize, hmm, I have that behavior, too. And I say, explain that you did that. Because you believe that that was the greatest advantage of a disadvantage in the moment you acted that way? She goes, I did. I said, so what you thought was something was wise to do was labeled intolerant by somebody else. She goes, that's true. I said, Do you own that trait that you've been judging in this person? Now? I do. I said, now go to a moment when you actually perceive this individual being intolerant. Great. Now, in that moment, how did that serve you? It didn't? How can it do that? I went, wait a minute now your intolerance and serving people? How did this intolerance of this individual serve you? I can't see it. I don't know when somebody says I don't know I can't and I'm not. That means that it's low in their values to do it, their pride is going to be altered. If you confront that. I said, go look, again, I held her accountable, look for the benefits. And then we came to this realization that this very person that was intolerance is what initiated her career path of being a leader. It made her write a book, it made her have a following it made her have infants, and she was a housewife before that. And she became a world leader, a female world leader in the in the industry. I said to your saying that this person that's absolute evil, that's been intolerant is not a gift if that because you're what you're saying, as you catalyze all the things you've done, is everything you've done part of that evil, or is it actually contributed? She's what's contributed to what then it came out of that experience that you call was evil.

She went, huh? I said, Did you ever thank them for all the accomplishment or give them a cut out of the royalty for stimulating this drive? She goes, I didn't. And I made her think of the benefits and we calculated 32 benefits until tears came out of her eyes. When she did her makeup was messed up. She sat there and she goes, Huh. Now she had there's a there's a Palestinian Israeli leaders in the room. And she said I need to take a break. And we gave everybody a little potty break. And all of a sudden that guy that she was judging was in the room came up to me and said, Wow, my anger towards these people have just shifted from this conversation. I could have swore she was talking about me. And I said she was talking about you. You were the one that catalyzed her career. 28 years ago, you've been added a long time. He says, I'm gonna have to go and revamp this. Anyway, we got them conversing, we got them in mediation, we got them conversing. And she went on the radio and changed her attitude. Cuz I told her, I said, are you really committed to mediating and revisit resolving conflict? Are you interested in being right and perpetuating this as you've been doing for 14 years. Because if you're just doing it for your own pride, to get a center of attention, be honest with yourself, if you really want to meet that in that position of righteousness is not going to get you anywhere. And it calmed down that day. And she went on the radio show when I came back to meet with her the next time, she had me interviewed on a radio show. And she told me the entire story, how she humbled herself, and now made progress. Because as long as she was right, she wasn't love. And that's an inauthentic turned into authentic and when you get authentic life transforms.

Alex Ferrari 44:15
As a very powerful story and and as you were talking, I remind myself of all the quote unquote bad things or evil things or negative things that happened to my in my life. And when you start looking back, if it wasn't for those bad things, if it wasn't for those things that I perceived were the end of the world for me at that moment. I look back and going What a blessing that was because that spawned me to do this. I sit here right now speaking to you and with this show and multiple other podcasts that I run, because I come from a place of trying to help people avoid pitfalls in life to try to help them on their path to help guide them because when I was in the darkest time of my life, I didn't truly have anyone to help me. And only my me going through that the darkest worst time in my life did that spawn this wanting to help other people so, so vividly. And now I thank that person in that situation. And I honor it because it truly is made me who I am. The while I was going through it, it was held for about a year. But after that time, I was able to now look back 18 years now to 19 years from from what had happened. And thank that situation for who I am today and the work that I'm doing. And that's hard to see when you're in the book, you need to pull back from the book to be able to see what's going on.

Dr. John Demartini 45:50
Well, the hell that we call hell is just in complete awareness. And it is an exact event needed to break our addiction to a fantasy of that we are so we can come into our authenticity, our addiction to fantasies that what read our Hell's I always say that the more you're addicted to protection, the more you attract aggression. The more you're addicted to peace, the more you attract violence, the more you're addicted to one side, the more you attract the other side, to teach you to embrace both sides of life, you need the sympathetic comparison thing. You need the prey and Predator if you had nothing but prey without predator you'd be gluttonous and fat and not fit. If you had nothing but predator without prey it'd be emaciated, starved and not fit. But you put prey and Predator together supporter and challenge of their the peace in the world together, you get fit, maximum life, maximum order, maximum growth and development occurs at the border of the support and the challenge the pairs of opposites. And every perception, every perception that we ever make, versus a pair of opposites. And it's in that moment of perception that the conscious and unconscious split with subjective biases and we label things impulsively or instinctively to seek and avoid, and the world runs as extrinsically. But the moment we ask the right question to become fully conscious in that moment, and see both sides, we become poised and present back into authenticity. Otherwise, we're going to be seeking it and subordinating or avoiding it, and subordinating, instead of being just ordinate. And when we see the order, we're ordinate. We have equanimity within US equity between others and we have the most sustainable, we have less noise in the brain for great clarity of consciousness, we have a yearning to contribute, our business becomes more stable, our economics become more greater self worth, our relationships are more stable, our social contribution is more stable, our physical fitness is more stable. We have resilience, adaptability, heart rate variability, it's it goes up. And we're inspired. So everything in the world I think, is trying to guide us back to that even the things we think are hellacious. They're not. They're just we've been holding on to our fantasy, we need a good jolt to break our addiction to the fantasies.

Alex Ferrari 47:58
It's a great example of what we're talking about. And I think everyone listening will understand. There was a movie many years ago, I think, is 78 or 76, called JAWS, and jaws came out, and all of a sudden, sharks were evil. They are monsters that need to be eradicated from the planet. And unfortunately, that is what's been happening over the course of the last 40 or 50 years that people look at a shark and is oh my god, they need to be wiped out. But without sharks, the ocean would be completely unbalanced. That predator lets the prey go crazy. It happened in Yellowstone. When the wolves were gone. That out of Yellowstone, the deer population exploded. And then plants started to die off because there was too many deers eating the plants. But the second that wolves were brought back in thing I was I was watching that. foliage is in trees that had been dead for 50 years, started to flourish again, just because the wolves were back in Yellowstone. So it's just, again, wolves, another character in story that is our pure evil. But I think it's just a good example to show what we label as bad is really has a purpose in the balance of the world and the balance of ecosystems. Correct.

Dr. John Demartini 49:22
I was just, I was just in some of the atolls in the French Polynesia. And there was a snorkeling moment where we counted 400 Sharks going around us. None of them were interested in eating us. No, I used to serve for the sharks. Never they never ate anybody. Now there are places in Australia where the warmer water is where they sometimes get caught in a warmer water and people get affected by sharks. Button used to stop and think How many billions, probably the sharks are in the world, in the oceans. And how many casualties from that? It's definitely over already. Sharks, are they in these sharks that were there were eight to 10 foot, six foot to 10 foot. They were eating small fish. You know, everything had its place in there, we were not its target. If we were bleeding and we were just to damage it might maybe notice that it wasn't interested that people were literally snorkeling, their own sharks are everywhere. I mean, right next to you, but they never bothered you. So we have subjective biases because of incomplete information, labeling things good or bad. Because I always say that whatever you experience, you can make a heaven out of a hell or a hell of a heaven, I specialize. And I teach a program called the break to experience and we're doing it 1143 times last 33 years. And I have people come in with every imaginable thing that's happened in their life that they think is torture and trauma and tragedy and turmoil and this and that. And I have yet to find something that the mortal body can experience, that the immortal soul, the state of unconditional love can't transcend. So I just hold people accountable instead of having them run their story. Stop the story. Don't be a victim of history. Stop the story, stop running a story about how terrible something is, stop and ask, how is it going to help me fulfill what is most meaningful to me? How is it serving me? How is it benefiting me? How is it strength to me? What is it allowing me to do that I wouldn't be able to do what is it keep me from having to do that I don't want to do ask a new set of questions, your quality of your life changes. And don't be attached to the opposite. Whatever you condemn, it's opposite becomes a fantasy. And whatever you have is a fantasy, it's opposite becomes a nightmare. You create these by the very delusion of one side of the other. But by keeping yourself from the fantasy, you know, people have a fantasy that life's supposed to be always peaceful and kind. There is no such thing as a human being. That's always peaceful and kind, there is no such thing. I'm not a kind person, I'm not a cruel person, I'm not nice, I'm not mean, I have moments when I'm nice when you support my values. And I'm moments when I can be a tiger. When you challenge my values. I'm a human being, I have all parts, I don't need to get rid of half of myself to love myself, neither neither does anybody else. Nor do you have to get rid of half the world to love the world. the magnificence of the world is there if you open your eyes to see the balance of opposites, to extract meaning out of your existence, is to be able to see the upsides to what you think is down and the downs to what you think is up and balance the equation out and become present. And then the world outside you doesn't run you because now the governance within governs your perceptions. William James said the greatest discovery of his generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their perceptions and attitudes in mind. I agree with him on that. And we'll help one another founder of psychology said there's simultaneous contrast and sequential contrast, when you have sequential contrasts, your emotional and your reading the world around you around you, because you're seeing good without evil or evil without good in your illusion. But when you have simultaneous contrast, you see neither. And you realize there's the upside to what I thought was down, there's the down to what I think I see the balance and I'm appreciated the order that sitting there. And it allows you to kind of feel a communion with a almost an intelligence in the universe. It was Einstein that said, it's enough for me on a daily basis to contemplate just a small portion of the magnificent pattern and tapestry in the universe. He was interested in that he wasn't into an engine anthropomorphic deities created by insecure individuals that created moral hypocrisy. He was interested in an overarching awareness of the magnificent sitting inside the universe. And I'm a firm believer that that's accessible to any human being if they ask the right question.

Alex Ferrari 54:04
I'm going to ask you this question. So many people in the world have had body issues that they want to lose weight or they want to get healthier, they want to do this. And so many have tried every diet, every fad, every workout routine. And the story that they're telling them themselves is like I've been around I've done so many things, nothing ever works for me. What would you say to to people like that are fighting with this constantly in their lives? As an example of changing the story or asking the right questions.

Dr. John Demartini 54:34
Glenn address that. First of all, no one does anything unless they perceive in that moment. There's more advantage and disadvantage. And so when somebody tells me I got to stop overeating, I keep over eating. I got to stop this I need to start exercising. Anytime somebody says something like that, but isn't living it I pay no attention. I don't pay attention to what people say I pay attention to what they live. Because what they live, you have people all the time. So this relationship is killing me 10 years later, they're still there talking about how it's killing them. Or their job is the same way. I don't pay attention to what people say I pay attention to what they actually are doing. And because if they are doing it, there's a reason for it. So then I asked him, can I give a real case, I'll give you a real case, please. I was asked, maybe 10 years ago to do a reality TV show with universal Universal Studios. And they said, Dr. Demartini, what we want you to do is we want you to transform 12 people's lives, you got 24 hours to do it. And we're going to select some of the craziest things you can imagine from a homeless to a heroin addict to an overweight, over eater to somebody that tried to commit suicide, we're going to give you these cases, and you're going to do what you can in two hours, and we're going to film the whole thing before nap. I said, Okay, fine. So I get this lady who comes in, and she walks into this, this place where we're filming. And she brings two boxes of food. And then she goes on, and she says, I brought everybody suffered in case we had got hungry and everything else like that. Nobody asked for food, there's already food there. But she just went out of her way to do that. And then she went on to eating those two boxes. Now this is more food than I eat in a week. Cheated that day. It was unbelievable. I just like wait and comprehensible, how you can even put that much food in your body. Just gouge it to just devour the food. And then she turns to me and she says you got to help me I have a eating disorder. And you got to help me I can't stop eating and everything else like that. And I've gained weight everything else. And she was a large woman. And the first thing I asked her time says start. I said, Okay, stop the story. Stop talking. Because you're telling me you've got to stop, but you're not. So you're getting an advantage out of it. I want to know what the unconscious motives are. So what's the benefit of you eating? Like you do and keep keeping the weight on it? So I said what's, what's the benefit of somebody you eating? Extra there isn't there's no benefit? I can't think of any I should look again, you wouldn't be doing it if there wasn't a benefit, what's the benefit? You're getting out of it? So all of a sudden, she said, she said, Well, um, everybody in my family is large and overweight. And as a result of them being overweight, I don't feel like I'm part of the family unless, like, big. And this is my way of feeling part of the family. And I said, Okay, great. Write that down. So she writes it down, go to the next benefit, why do you keep being overweight, another benefit of why you're why you're overweight. And she says, Uh huh. My sister was bigger than me as a child. And because of that, she used to push me around and bully me. And I made a point to never be smaller than her so she can never push me around. So no matter what her size is, I'm always bigger. I said, Great. Write that down. Now go to the third one. And just keep going as she comes to this next one. And she said, wow, she got teary eyed and she goes, whoa, Chad hit a Kleenex. And she said, there was a point in my life where I went on a almost a fasting, you know, wild fasting thing I lost 45 pounds. And I started to get a bit of a shape, never real shape. But I mean, I started to have a bit of a shape. And a guy hit on me. And, and I thought I was in love. I had never been with a guy. But this guy showed affection towards me. And all of a sudden I I fell for it, I guess. And the very first night I was with this guy we made love. I didn't even know how to make love. And we made love. And the next day, I never saw him again. That was it is gone. And then six weeks later, I found out I was pregnant. And I'm a Catholic. And I was raised that you're going to go to hell, if I have abortion, and you're going to go to hell. If you have sex out of wedlock, you're going to go to hell, if you don't marry this person, and all this conflict was in her head. And the turmoil she went through the torture she went through, made her say to herself deep inside. I will never allow myself to be attractive to a man like that, again, never been with a man since she made sure she never lost weight because the last time she lost weight. That's what happened. So we have associations that we accumulate in our life that are stored in a so called subconscious mind, which are actually facilitations and ambitions in the brain that are storing up noise in the brain. And what this does is it makes us make decisions that are not on a conscious level noise but is on a subconscious level and it's making us avoid and seek accordingly. She also found out that she's in the in the television industry and if she's looks when she eats her skin is stretched and it's smooth. And people always compliment her on our stretch and a large press. So when she's on TV, she always shows the top path, which is smooth skin, the Karen big breast. But if she loses weight, they everything sags and she starts losing some of that tone. And so she had unconscious motives that were making sure she kept her weight on. Now, I've worked with hundreds and probably 1000 cases of quote, overweight. And I've worked with organizations that have had that I've yet to find a reason an individually didn't have an unconscious motive. And even the thyroid, they said, Well, I've got a low thyroid, yeah, but even the thyroid, the thyroid gland comes from the thyroglossal, duck, Wrath pouch, everything else. And it comes from a state where all of a sudden, it's involved in speech and the tongue and metabolism. And if for some reason, you are not speaking up and holding what you want to say inside your thyroid goes down, if you're speaking up and saying something tactlessly without thinking your thyroid goes up. And so they were repressing what they were going to say because this person was in a relationship and was afraid of stirring up the pot with a relationship and it was suppressing it and shutting down the thyroid. Also, sometimes I see people that like so all the reasons why people keep weight, there's always a motive for it. Because anytime you have subconsciously stored baggage sitting inside that's not brought up and neutralize the gralen and leptin hormones which are involved in over eating and under eating is skewed and thrown off the homeostatic mechanism is actually reset not in a Senate centered state, but off to one side. And we go into this addictive cycle, because we're actually trying to prevent ourselves from the things we've associated with keeping weight down. So I'm a firm believer and asking what those unconscious motives are bringing them to the conscious level, and then addressing them by coming up with viable alternative ways of getting those same accomplished same benefits that they're getting by a viable alternative. And then linking that to what they value most. And then D linking what they're doing from their values, and rearranging that, and not disempowering them not saying that they have no power, not giving them some anthropomorphic deity to protect them and to take them because they have no power. But to actually realize that they've done this on an unconscious level and have the power to change their life consciously.

Alex Ferrari 1:02:20
What would be the questions that you would ask you should be asking yourself, if you feel that you're overweight, or you feel like you have there's an area of your of the you know, you're overeating or this or that what are those questions that you need to ask yourself in order to come to grips with the true reason why you are overweight.

Dr. John Demartini 1:02:39
But first thing is that anytime you're not filling your day with the highest priority actions that are most deeply meaningful and inspiring and spontaneously important to you. The blood glucose noxion goes into the middle and not the executive center. executive center governs those behaviors and keeps some moderate. When you're out of the executive center, you're going to the middle and Nicholas starts polarizing things, you become an essence of bipolar state you overeat under eight, you feel guilty, you have a licensing attack. So the first thing to do is to fill your day with high priority actions to start identifying what is meaningful to your life. Because if you don't fill it with meaning you're going to fill it with food, you're gonna fill it with drugs, you're gonna fill it with sacks, you're gonna fill it with whatever the addictive drivers are. Whatever you've associated with pleasure without pain, you go back to those a second, you're not doing something meaningful. Almost everybody knows if they've got an incredible event going on a wedding that they're about to get married in, they're about to be in a dress for the 10 days beforehand. They're not overeating. They're making sure they've got something purposefully to get but the day of the wedding once they've got the ring, now their ovary, but up until that they have something meaningful to get to get a picture taken in them in a wedding dress. So anytime you fill your day with something meaningful, you're less likely to over eat or over drink or over anything. So that's the first step. And then you got to find out what are the benefits you're getting out of it. And be honest about it. Because if you deny the benefit you're getting out of it, you're gonna pretend like it's running you when in fact you're running in and quit giving your power away to something outside you because I don't, I don't find that to be true, your dopamine levels are not something because of extrinsic. It's the associations you made with it. That's why I've been able to take people who have been on heroin off heroin without side effects. By going into the moments they're actually in the hide from the heroin and find out where the low is at that moment because you can't have one without the other in the brain and show them the pains associated with it. And all the sudden the very highs that they have withdrawal symptoms from anytime you feel the loss of that which you feel high about you're going to have the withdrawal symptoms if I show them the pain associated with that those moments of high and balance some there's no withdrawal symptoms, and then you can take them off the so called heroin or off the drug use so this six addictions or whatever it may be that's that's the assumption that they had a positive without a negative on. There's never an addiction that a subduction something they're trying to avoid. It's been in their mind traumatizing that they're trying to dissociate from and the compensation for that which they exist. associated with pleasure. So I go in there and balance out the equations on both of them and find out their motives for doing it. It's not that hard to do, I have a whole series of steps that I go through to help dissolve that in people. And in the normal recidivism rates of, of the 12 step program is three to 7%. Most cases, maybe 15. In some cases, you can get 80 90% If you ask the right questions, and help people not dodge the accountabilities of their own creation.

Alex Ferrari 1:05:26
What is the Demartini method?

Dr. John Demartini 1:05:29
The Demartini method is a series of questions that make you conscious of what was unconscious, to bring you into full consciousness to see the balance that's inherent in life that you're overlooking. When you're in emotional swings, and allows you to stabilize yourself and be more purposeful and instead of volatile. It allows you to take resentments that are infatuations or pride or shame or grief, or all the classical reactions that you face and neutralize them. And it's a very powerful tool, I've used it all over the world. We've used it in the Christchurch earthquake, we've done it the tsunami and forget the tsunami and in Japan, the earthquake in Japan, the China one, we've used it and brought in facilitators to help people, it's a very powerful tool in helping you see the order in your apparent chaos in life. So you can be grateful for life instead of being caught in baggage stories.

Alex Ferrari 1:06:23
Right, as opposed to living in the memories or living in the imagination, which is the future you're living in the in the now and focusing on what you can do currently.

Dr. John Demartini 1:06:32
Every time you under Have you have memory and imagination, you have the arrow of time, and up as a result of the arrow of time, the tendency disorder, the second you actually become fully conscious of things. There's no time, as Deepak wisely said, timeless mind age, this body, in that moment, you're present. And when you're present, there's no addictive behavior. When you're present, doing something that's deeply meaningful, and you've extracted the meaning out of your existence. And your present doing that. You don't even think about it. Almost everybody can think of a moment in their life where they've been extremely engaged, really inspired by doing something deeply meaningful. And in those moments, they're not overeating. They're not over drinking, they don't even think about those things. They're preoccupied and present with something that's extremely meaningful to them at that moment. And I'm a firm believer that that's if you fill your day with challenges that inspire you, it doesn't fill up a challenge, don't you fill your day with high priority actions inspire you, it doesn't fill up a low priority distractions that don't, it's a low priority distractions that initiate the amygdala. It's the high priority actions that wake up the executive function. We have in self an authentic and executive and grateful capacity at any time, if we prioritize our life, but we can't do priorities by living by other people's expectations, we do priorities by going inside. And when the voice division on the inside is louder than all those opinions on the outside, now you begin to master your life.

Alex Ferrari 1:07:58
Now, I'll ask you a couple questions. Ask all my guests. What is your mission in this life?

Dr. John Demartini 1:08:03
Oh, for 50 years I've been teaching. And this is what I love doing, researching, writing and teaching every day. And I just do that every day. That's what I love doing. And I every possible vehicle, or radio, television, newspapers, magazines, movies, podcasts, blogs, any possible vehicle that has allowed me to get a message out. I use to research and share and disseminate information to help people see the magnificence of their life, and be able to see the order in their life instead of sitting there caught in the assumed chaos in their life. So that's what I do. That's my mission. That's what I love. It's, I hope to do that till I my physical body doesn't allow me to do it anymore.

Alex Ferrari 1:08:50
And why do you think we are all here? Well, that's

Dr. John Demartini 1:08:53
individualized, it's based on the hierarchy of their values, which is a fingerprint specific uniqueness. Each individual will feel called to do what is meaningful to them and the world needs all the above. It needs every possible value arrangement. There's some people are going to be dedicated to raising kids and families and some will be business and some wealth and everybody is needed. And nobody's right or wrong. But everybody's needed. And believe it or not even the villain, without the villain, there's no heroes. Without the crime, there's no police, you know, there everybody has a place in the game. And whenever you see somebody is trying to give something from nothing, you will automatically create and generate somebody trying to get something for nothing. So all the do gooders over there that are altruistic that are sacrificing themselves for other people actually are breeding the narcissist that are coming out and sacrificing others to themselves. And these are pairs of opposites that most people don't see. And we label one good and the other evil, but these are genetically inseparable, complementary, entangled pairs of opposites in the world. And so that's why everybody serves and our job is not to try to fit somebody into your model that are reality here, but just just to help people realize that their participation serves a magnificent contribution. And the second, they believe that and see that they participate on a more fuller conscious level, you can't have, I'm not gonna say that anybody's anybody's got the right, this or the right don't live like that don't find that to be productive cameras meaningful to you is your path.

Alex Ferrari 1:10:23
You can't have Darth Vader without Luke Skywalker.

Dr. John Demartini 1:10:27
Exactly. I always say, if you want to master your life, you have to honor both the hero and the villain, the saint in the center, you have to honor all of you. So you're only going to grow to the level of what you can honor. And if you've got a part, you know, I don't want to I want to deny that part, you're only going to grow to that part, you're not going to go past it. So anything that you infatuate with or condemning yourself is going to run your life and to love yourself. So the same thing for other people, because they're just representing that. And if you judge them, they're judging that inside you, I, I always say that people that want to dissociate and blame things on the outside and look for solutions on the outside are not going to be as powerful as people who realize that those are their perceptions of the outside and take command of that perception and your actions, and give yourself permission to be all the above. Ready to be a part of myself about myself.

Alex Ferrari 1:11:16
And Doc, where can people find out more about your work and your books and your courses and the things you do?

Dr. John Demartini 1:11:22
Well, they can endure me after this. This is interview. They may think this guy's a bit wild, but they can just go to drdemartini.com. On there's a there's a value determination process, which is free and private and complimentary. Take the time to take 30 minutes of your life and go and do that exercise. It's 13 questions that might just open up a new awareness about what's really important to you about what deeply what you really committed to and then start structuring your life accordingly. But go on and do that. But the drdemartini.com is the website. They can spend the rest of their life on there, there's more information on there that they can probably look at and observe and read and study for the rest of their life. So it'll keep you busy.

Alex Ferrari 1:12:06
Dr. Demartini, thank you so much for coming on the show. This has been a fantastic conversation. And I look forward to having you back on the show in the future because I know we can talk about many, many things. So I appreciate you so much, and I appreciate what you do for the world. So thank you my friend.

Dr. John Demartini 1:12:22
Well, thank you, Alex. I appreciate the opportunity on your show. And thank you for the great questions and and whoever's listening out there, thank you for supporting the show because that's what we're all about helping disseminate information that can be of service to people. So thank you, Alex.

 

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