Alex Ferrari 0:00
Tell me what your life was like before you died.

Jason Janas 0:08
April 2 was the day of my death. I came home from this job I didn't like I made a sandwich, took a shower, made a sandwich, sat down. It was a bagel sandwich. I turned on the TV, and I was watching TV, and I took a couple bites, and also I threw up. And I'm like, that was the most wretched taste. It didn't even taste like eggs. And what I was eating, and I'm like, God, what was that, you know? And I was having difficulty breathing, and I was waking up for the last couple weeks with a taste of blood in my mouth. And then I went to take another bite, and I coughed and up came bright red blood. And I'm like, not, you know, when you cut your finger and it's dark red, this was pink. And I'm like, and I cough again, and I kept coughing, like every two or three seconds, and I filled up my plate full of blood. This pink blood, it was horrible tasting. I remember that. And I'm like, next thing I know, I'm going, I can't breathe, and I'm starting to panic, like life is going on around you, and I'm actively dying. And I grabbed my cell phone, and I'm trying to get a hold of my ex wife, and because she's a nurse, an RN, if anybody can help me, she could. And I'm like, she wouldn't answer the phone. And finally, on this, you know, fourth or fifth try, I was FaceTiming, and I had made it to the kitchen sink, because now I'm filling up the kitchen sink with this blood. And she's like, What do you want? And I tried to speak, and blood covered the phone. And I just remember her. One of the last things I remember was like, Jason. And I said, I don't feel good, you know, and I'm, you know, and I'm trying to breathe and, you know, coughing. And she goes, I said, I'm sorry. I'm gonna go lay down. And she said, Jason, if you lie down, you're going to die. And I said, I don't feel good, I'm tired. I said, I'm just, I'm sorry to bother you, and I'm still coughing up this blood. She says, Jason, if you lay down, you're going to die. Please don't lay down. And I said, I and she hung up the phone, and that's the last thing. I'm like, wow, why couldn't our why couldn't our conversations be like that in our marriage, you know? And I was like, and next thing I know, I wake up in the hospital, and I She must have dialed 911, and they came in. I'd have no clue of the ambulance or anything, and there was a tube down my throat, IV in the carotid artery. My hands and feet were strapped to the bed. I couldn't move them more than an eighth of an inch. Stuff up my nose in a myriad of doctors. Now it's dark out. I have no idea what day it is, what what had taken place? How long I was gone or out? And I have these doctors trying, do you know, you know, who are you? Do you know your name? And I'm, I can't even move my you know? And you like, Do you know where you are? Like, trying to answer questions, but I have a two inch tube, you know? And I'm, like, that was the most brutal experience of my life. It was when you see actors going through this on stage, and they just jump up, and they're what, no, no, you don't do that. It's brutal. It was the most excruciating pain I've ever been in. Dying was very painful. I was drowning. Basically my cause of death was acute respiratory failure, hypoxia. So I basically they pumped out 2.8 liters of blood from my lungs. That's 11.8 cups of blood. So I drown. So all I remember then was blackness, just blackness. And I woke up in the hospital, and this is where the nd took place. What when? I don't know, I'm assuming, a few days later, I was trying to say something, and I was like, she goes, You won't pull the tubes and stuff out. And I said, you know? So I made this, like, you want to write something, I'd write, I itch just, you know, because they were giving me, uh, fentanyl for the pain. When you see somebody in like a coma state, their mind is fully active, okay, you're, I mean, I was having horrific hallucinations. Or, you know, like I was being kidnapped and dragged and all these kind of, it was horrific. It was the most horrific experience of my life. So I'm like, I itch, and I just started scratching my body. And they like, okay, he's not going to do it. And I just laid there, and I the moment I awoke, though, up in the left hand corner of where's the TV? And I didn't know that the ICU was room, so they put me in a different room, but right where that TV was, there was an undeniable presence. I could feel it, you know, and it was strong, and it was loving. And I just wanted to go there. And I kept trying to peek through the myriad of doctors. And one day a nurse came in and said, Jason, do you want me to turn on the TV for you? And I'm no. I mean, how do you tell somebody, somebody standing there, there's somebody right there, okay, they're gonna think I'm nuts, right? And I'm like, I just kept staring at the TV. So the nurses were gone. Everything was gone. They had finally taken the tube out and the IV and stuff like this. And it was some like early afternoon. I don't know what day it was, and I'm staring at the TV. There's nobody around. And by this time, I was so lethargic. I'd lost 75 pounds. So I was very weak. I couldn't move my hands very much, but I got up on my elbows, and I just began shaking uncontrollable because I had no strength. Now this is the first time since 1977 78 that I talked to God. I abandoned him. I threw him out like garbage. I threw Jesus out like garbage, and I stared at that TV because that presence was there. And I just I called out to God, please don't let me die. Please don't let me die. I had no. Business talking to him, you know, with the things that I have done in my life, I knew I was unworthy of him, and I called out to him, and I said, Please don't let me die. I love you. I said I'd never stop believing in you, but I quit having a relationship with you, and I'm trying. I'm truly sorry. I said, I love Jesus. I said, I love you both. And I said, Please don't take my babies from me, please. And I'm feeling unworthy of him. And I said, Please, let me see them again. Please, let me see them again. Because I knew I was still dying, something inside told me that I was not done with this, and I wasn't. And I said there was somebody in my life that which is a twin flame, but I won't mention her name yet. I said, Please don't take her from me. Please, please. Let me hold her hands. Let me kiss her. Let me smell her breath. Let's make love again. And in that moment, I was at the top of the ceiling, and I was in constant and I could see everything around me, the nurse's station, all 30 other patients on ventilators, dying. Pain is gone. I was young again. I was juiced, and I was vibrating at such a high frequency in constant this love and this light. And I knew that was God, that I that was there when I was at constant, this love, and I knew that I had done nothing wrong and that I was loved. For the first time in my life. I was loved unconditionally. There was no if ands or buts, nothing. I was at peace, utter piece, and I knew exactly where I was, exactly where I was. And the thought came into my mind. It was an instant I was like, I'm home, and I'm just looking outside, and I could see I was up on the, like, third or fourth floor. I could see the entire floor. I could see through the wall. So I was seeing through the wall, and I could see every blade of grass in the field, every blade of grass independently. I could see the serrations in each blade of grass. I could see the veins, and I could see the colors moving through and then they turned towards me and sent me all of this unconditional love. I could see all the trees souls, and it looked like Obi Wan Kenobi when he came back, he had the little halo right, this little white light around it, all their souls and they were so happy to see me, and the colors that I was witnessing were just magnificent and beautiful. They just don't exist here in this realm. They don't. And I am just feeling this unconditional love flow through me. It was as warm as the sun, and it flowed through me like a river, right? And then the next thought that came in before I could get it formed, was like, what a beautiful day to die like it was absolute, like I have done it before. That's exactly what it was. It was just an absolute knowing that I had done this before. It was absolutely normal, and that was that. And then how long this took? I don't know. It could have been 10 seconds. It could have been five hours. Time ceased to exist, because time doesn't exist. And I felt another presence come to me, and my gaze, which isn't a gaze, because I'm looking down at a body on the bed that I had no love for, but it was like at 12 o'clock, because I was looking that way, and then all of a sudden, I still looking that way. It's hard to describe you have you know what I'm saying, 360 degree vision, so I'm facing forward, and that's when Yeshua showed up, and I instantly recognized his energy, and he bestowed love upon me that is unimaginable to anyone here. So I'm feeling Father's love. I'm feeling this love, and it's almost the best word to describe. It would be stifling. It was so much love, and I was adored unconditionally, and it was just the most profound and beautiful experience. And I'm thinking, I shouldn't be here, right? I, you know, I was lied to, right? So again, how long? How long this took? I don't know, but I'm, you know, then I felt Yeshua come up to me, and he What was my soul? Yeah, he placed his hands on me, very gently and loving, and they seemed so huge, and they were so warm. It was everything. Was warmth and love. And, you know, he played, and he guided my soul back. And then I felt him on my body, and then he lay gently, laid me down on the bed, and I was out like a light, like gone. And then I woke up at how long again, I don't know, but a myriad of doctors shaking me, Jason, Jason, Jason, and we've been trying to wake you for hours. You know? What would it seem like? You know? And I'm like, and the presence was gone. And I'm like, looking they're like, You okay? And I'm like, I can't tell them just what happened. I mean, what was that? What? What just happened? I came back because they pushed my my soul back into my body, and I woke up. And, you know, the doctors were there to bring in medical equipment and stuff, and the like, are you okay, you know? And I'm like, Yeah, I'm fine. They were like, what happened? And I'm like, I can't tell you that, you know, I felt something. I knew that they would think I was nuts, and, you know, and all that. And I'm like, I need you all to leave. Are you all right? I said I'm fine. I need you all to leave. And I'm raspy voice because I can't really talk. I'm not taking any meds. I want you all out of the room now. And they all left. And I'm like, what happened to me? That's not the place that I should have gone to, right? And then, well, in that moment, you know, it, became abundantly aware that, you know, there is no heaven, there is no hell, there is no good, there is no bad, there is no right, there is no wrong. Everything I was taught my entire life was a lie. And within that time frame of whatever. That, you know, however long I was on the other side that was shown to me and given to me, I was one with everything. Within a trillionth of a second, I knew everything there was to ever know I am, everything that has ever existed or will ever exist. In that moment, I became one with the Father. I became the light. I was the light. That means I became God. I am God. And when I realized that, I was like, I have a mission. I have to let the world know that they have been duped, lied to horrifically, right? And sure enough, when I finally got back home, there was that nudge, you know, I got mad at father, and I was, this is a couple months later, because I'm still feeling this unconditional love, you know. And it was kind of an ease off process, you know? And I'm like, I'm shaking my fist. Look, you picked the wrong list. Look, pal, you picked the wrong person, right? Because I knew I wasn't the nice person, and I've done bad things in my life, you know. And I'm like, You picked the wrong person. I said, No, and I'm pacing back and forth. And I finally got into my bedroom, and I was in my bathroom, walking out, I said, You picked the wrong person. You should have picked the Pope or a bishop. And this is when I heard my father speak to me. Now he speaks to you through your emotions all the time. We've just learned to tune him out, right? But this is when he spoke to me, and these were his exact words. He's kind of little on the myth side. And when I said that again, I said, You picked the wrong person. And he said, why not? You are my son. I collapsed on the floor at the end of my bed, and I looked up and I said, for all that I am I am you, I forgave myself for everything. I knew I had done nothing wrong, and I wiped the altar clean of all the false idols that I had put up there. And on my altar is my father, and that is it. So you are all exactly where you need to be I want you to understand that don't feel like, oh, Jason's better than no, I'm not better than anybody. I'm just further along than on my journey than you are. That's it. Anything that I can do you can do as well. And I'm telling you this, all of you go within. Do not seek anything outside yourself. You will find pain, misery and death go within, because that is where you are. That is where everything is that God gave you. On this journey, you will find nothing outside yourself. It is all an illusion and a dream.