The Key to Self Mastery (Toltec Wisdom) with Don Miguel Ruiz Jr.

At the age of 14, don Miguel Jr. apprenticed to his father don Miguel Sr. and his grandmother, Madre Sarita. From that early age, he was called upon to translate Madre Sarita’s prayers, lectures and workshops from Spanish into English. In this way, through constant repetition and review, he learned the content of her teachings in both languages. Through interpreting for Madre Sarita, don Miguel Jr. came to understand the power of faith.

He saw first-hand how she manifested her intent to heal people, both physically and spiritually. don Miguel Jr.’s apprenticeship lasted 10 years. When he reached his mid-20’s, his father intensified his training. At the apex of this power journey don Miguel said to his eldest son, “Find your way out. Go home and master Death by becoming alive.”

For the past 13 years, don Miguel Jr. has applied the lessons learned from his father and grandmother to define and enjoy his own personal freedom while achieving peace with all of creation. Today, he is married and has two young children.

As a Nagual, he continues to pass along the wisdom and the tools of his family’s traditions in helping others to achieve their own personal freedom and optimal physical and spiritual health in his lectures and workshops.

Miguel Jr. has taken the lessons of his father and grandmother, and discovered his own personal path to freedom. Being able to apply his teachings to the world around him gave Miguel Jr. a new understanding of the lessons his father and grandmother had passed onto him, once again giving him the desire to pass on this awareness through his books.

He is the author of the books: “The Five Levels of Attachment”, “Living a Life of Awareness”, “The Mastery of Self”, and “The Don Miguel Ruiz’s Little Book of Wisdom”. He also co-authored the book, “The Seven Secrets to Healthy, Happy Relationships” with his dear friend, HeatherAsh Amara. He now helps others discover optimal physical and spiritual health through his books, so that they may achieve their own personal freedom.

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Follow Along with the Transcript – Episode 067

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 0:00
The ability to control someone else's will by making them doubt themselves to make them doubt aerobic capacity to say yes and no. And if they believe you, they subjugate their will is called imposing and subjugation. Every parasite will find his or her perfect dose. This looks like peace, but it's not peace. It's complete lack of respect.

Alex Ferrari 0:28
I'd like to welcome to the show, Don Miguel Ruiz Jr. How you doing Don Miguel?

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 0:33
I'm doing good. Alex, thank you so much for having me on your show. It's truly an honor. Thank you.

Alex Ferrari 0:37
Thank you so much. Thank you so much for being on the show as well, we just had our our catch up in Spanish. Right before we started recording, but, but I do really appreciate you coming on. I've been a fan of your work and of course of your father's work for for many, many years. There are books that when you read them, they almost vibrate off the page, they kind of just hit you like a ton of bricks, especially when you're not expecting it. Which is what a good book does. You just pick up the Four Agreements, what is this stuff man mastery, what is and then you just boom, and it just hits you? Like a ton of bricks and that's exactly what it should. That's what it's built to do hopefully.

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 1:21
Yes, this this putting up a mirror in front of you as, as kind of like a having a moment of clarity. And when you have a moment of clarity, you have a choice to continue the cycle or to change direction.

Alex Ferrari 1:32
Now how did you get started on your spiritual journey?

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 1:38
Well, I was born into a family where the main spiritual figure was my grandmother Montessori. You can say that when people talk that I'm walking in my father's footsteps, I have to protect them. It's my grandma sadita with my father and my brother are continuing her dream. This is her image. This is her vision. My grandmother is a spiritual was a spiritual healer curandera and she opened up a little temple in Barrio Logan in San Diego, California in the 1970s. So she is the first one in the family to teach the tradition outside the family. Her father, Don Nothern, great grandmother and grandfather than a CPO. They didn't really teach it outside too much the family because it was still a little bit taboo. But it was my grandma, she had a moment of clarity in her life. She had a moment where she couldn't explain. But she was so grateful for her healing, because she was going through some she had lost her son, she had gone through some medical issues, and someone in the family took her to see a curandera. And it helped her so much she was so grateful. But she went to my her father, my grandpa, my great grandfather on a secret on another and began her training with him. And then and temple, my urine and Mexico City as well. Then she came back to the piano because her father was stationed there, he was the band, military band leader for the bell in the corner, whatever. And she continued to teach there. And she went to the San Diego where she opened up this little temple where she shared a tradition with everyone in the community. She would give her sermons on Thursday and Sunday, but during the week, she would do her healings and consultations. While it was into that world where when I was born, that was already going, you know, she my grandmother was already known for that. So I grew up Catholic and, and Toltec. You can say tech is not a religion. But having gone to my grandma services, I will still go to services. So my grandmother would give her sermons on that address on Sunday mornings, and I would go, I would be there because I live with her as well. So for me, she was the center of the family, she my grandpa, some weeks. And it was a beautiful thing to grow up with a community that always looks to them for guidance for health, for prayers, for many things. It was a beautiful thing to witness. And, you know, every Sunday, during the church, people would dress up and they're all in white. And they do their their songs, their chants, their music, their this their message and you know, shake hands afterwards. And it was beautiful. So my I the thing about being the eldest of my father's kids is that I remember Dr. Miguel Ruiz. I remember apprentice Miguel Ruiz, and of course I know Don Miguel Ruiz, I got to witness his transition because he was 23 years old when I was born. He was still going to medical school at Punam boomers. And he was he my father, my uncle Reese, who's an oncologist, my uncle Carrasco, son neurologist, my aunt was a psychiatrist. My mom was a dentist. On my father's side, you know, the youngest kids were all doctors. So you have all Western medicine. And then you have my grandma with the universe and Quran that is my faith healing. So you had two worlds going around. And you can say, I grew up in a world that juxtapositions of dualities that my father had his aha moment that made him shift his direction, started learning with my grandma Sarita Malika, and My great grandpa, Don, Don, Don, Leonardo, all the names just got confused. And began his apprenticeship. So my grandmother set up a group called in swing and, and taught began to teach him dreaming every Sunday night, so he would have him meditate for about three hours, if he moved, they will start all over again. You know, it's like, she, she had to teach them discipline. So I remember that moment. And at one point, my father decided to no longer be a doctor. At that point, he was a general practitioner, family therapist, and he was about to become an neurosurgeon, when he started, and imagine going through all that often have that epiphany and shifting, not completely shifting, letting go of that world. And slowly dedicating himself to teaching the tradition. So I remember that stage, I remember when my dad was sold his, his clinic, his little medical office, because it was, it was the National Medical Office in Tijuana, where my dad and my uncles all had their own individual offices. It was nice, you know, we got back from school to their office. And there they were, my dad stopped that. He became a full time apprentice. And my parents divorced at that point. Of course, I can't blame my mom for that. But, uh, but at that point, my father began to change the tradition just a little bit, because he saw that there was a lot of superstition. In it, you know, there was a lot of fanaticism that surrounded my grandmother's cloud that's surrounded that outer sphere of what she grew. So she wanted to my dad wanted to put her teachings in a language. That was what my dad would call common sense, you can say is the merger of the East and West. And there it was during that stage of my father's apprenticeship, you know, he put into practice, he got his self, a little mirror room, and he began to continue his meditations isn't suenos with my grandma, in this room full of mirrors and learn how to have the discipline to control his attention, and go. And then somewhere on the line, Don Miguel Ruiz showed up. Now as a son, I started reflecting his parenting skills. Dr. Miguel Ruiz demanded straight A's for example, he was very much a disciplinarian, very much like, you gotta give me straight A's and making us tense. You know, I lived I live in San Diego, I crossed the border to deployment to go to school in the corner. So that's, you know, I kind of did an opposite. Then apprentice Domingo, Amin galleries was different. All of a sudden, he was not so strict with a tense but it became a little bit more of a between strictness and a licensed fair type of thing. You know, it's like, alright, this is your life. This is your education. I'm here to help you. But this is your life. From now on, this is basically I'm going from ninth to 10th grade. My dad says, You are now responsible for education. I'm not going to drive you to school to sign you up. I'm not going to go and search for the teacher. I'm not going to do this. This is your education. And that's the way my color teach us. You know, if you wanted to learn how to swim, you just push into the pool and says swim. I can't swim, swim, but that I can soon Miguel, you hit the pop water you're swimming. Oh, somebody paddling but so that's the way my father teachers, then Don Miguel Ruiz style of parenting. Granted, I was somewhere in my senior year of high school or junior or college, where all of a sudden he his approach to parenting was more of a I am here to help you but I know you can do this yourself. He basically let me experience the concept consists of every choice I made. I'm not the Greek, basically. So in those three styles and granted, I was the deaf, totally different age during the whole thing. But what he expected of me changed with everything. I say this because in my experience with spirituality, you have my grandma, who was the head figurehead of the family. Who I apprenticed with for 10 years, that was my job. When I when I got initiated into the Toltec tradition. When I was 14 years old, my father says, I'm gonna teach you wants to start and finish college. In the meantime, your grandmother is going to be your teacher, and you're going to do it. By translating everything she says, you're going to help her everything she does. My grandmother spoke no English, it was only Spanish. And I translated for lectures for sermons or consultations for prayers, everything I was just, and she had to basically teach me how to focus my attention in her own unique way with me. So that was my, my upbringing, combination of academia, with spirituality, Tukwila and San Diego, and a family that was completely involved in spirituality, at the same time, very involved with our everyday life. So that's my background, and in that, and then I graduated college, and my father intensified My, my, my teachings. And you can say, there's something called the shift the assemblage point, where he put me in a place where I question everything I knew, and had to start from the very beginning, and not be able to detach from everything I know, get scrutiny, basically, applying the fifth agreement, be skeptical, but learn to listen with everything. And see life as is, and letting go of that identity that I've created. And to be honest with you, one of the biggest heartbreaks I've ever had is realizing I wasn't what I pretended to be. And that's a heartbreak. So we have to hit that low bottom. And then from there, you start building up, again, reconstructing your dream. And that's my, that's my background.

Alex Ferrari 12:24
So in many ways, your grandmother was like Bruce Lee, because she had teachings that were only supposed to be in her own culture, her own family, but yet she taught other people as well. Yeah. And same for your friend. Same for your father. So they're both they're both kind of spiritual, Bruce Lee's.

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 12:44
That's the thing is like in 2007, she was inducted into the Sanibel Women's Hall of Fame. Basically, she was inducted into the Hall of Fame in San Diego because they recognized that she kept this traditional life not. When my father started. It was my grandmother who was famous. Everyone knew who lives in that community knew who Myra Sarita was, and not just in San Diego, but basically, anyone who was into spirituality at the time. And my dad had that, you know, that expectation and he just saved my grandmother. Open the gates. My father destroyed the gates.

Alex Ferrari 13:21
Yeah, pretty pretty much you pretty much no question. Now for everyone listening. Can you talk a little bit about what total wills wisdom is in the philosophy of total of being a Toltec?

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 13:32
Sure, sure. Well, the word the word Toltec is another word to word that if I translated into English, it means artist, artisan, artisan. So if I translate the phrase, the topic or the transformation into 100%, English, it means the artists path of transformation. I'm an artist, and the canvas for my work of art is my life. And the instruments I'm going to use to create that work of art is going to be my body, my intent, My Will my mind, my Yes, and my No. And with these instruments, I can create the most perfect nightmare, or the most harmonious stream. So imagine a work of art that changes and shifts with every choice I make. So, to paraphrase my grandmother during my apprenticeship, that's the question she would always ask me. Do you control knowledge? Or does knowledge control you? And she would always change that question. No, she is the bottle drinking you are you drinking the bottle or type of thing? You know, she would always try to find a way to put it back in that direction. Do you control knowledge or is knowledge control you? When I was 14 years old, I have no idea but as I grew older, when knowledge controls me is I'm completely conditioned or domesticated by the environment surrounds me and the family the culture into saying yes or no to what they want me to do, which means the work of art I'm creating is Not my work of art is someone else's work of art, someone else's point of view someone else's expectation, someone else's prejudice, someone else's projection of how I'm supposed to be. You can say that the main problem with the Four Agreements, and every single one of our books deals with this domestication, which is a system of reward and punishment by which we model the behavior of an individual, where if you live up to expectation, you're worthy of our reward. And if you fall short of it, you're worthy of the punishments. Since we are emotional beings, that reward feels like acceptance, which feels like love. And the punishment feels like rejection and the lack thereof of love, is the way we've learned to love conditionally, I love you if. But if you begin to regain control of your yes and your no regain control of your intent, your impeccability of your word or your pick ability of yourself pick ability of your intent, then it goes back to I control knowledge. And knowledge is the instrument by which I informed my choices, but I'm the one making the choice, you can say is me creating the work of art that is my life, by my choice based on everything I've learned. But it's my choice, as opposed to the condition or projection that I was supposed to do according to whatever conditioning or domestication I had. So that's basically at the very basis of it, am I creating the most perfect nightmare? What am I creating was a beautiful, harmonious dream. And is it really your dream? It's your experience

Alex Ferrari 16:33
I want to kind of go into a little deeper into what you just said, there's, and I know where you're coming from. But I know a lot of people might be thinking this listening, you made the assumption, or at least that the statement that you are the creator of the nightmare, or the dream, where most people believe that life happens to them, and that they don't control what happens to them. Now, to a certain extent, there are certain things that a car accident and death in the family, you know, a relationship doesn't work out. Those are things that are somewhat out of our control many times. But yet how you deal with them is in your control. Can you kind of dive into that just a little bit?

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 17:25
Sure, if I can, for my interpretation of the question, you can say that I am a co creator with everything in life. Now, as a co creator, I only control to the tips of my fingers. I don't know the will of another. I don't control the perception of another. I only control my perception. And I only control my will. Just like imagine me my wife. And I say me and my wife put our fingers like this. She controls to the tips of her fingers I control to the tips of mine. To respect her is to respect her yes and or No. or No is just as powerful as your Yes. As her. Yes. The thing is, in order for me to respect her No, I have to learn how to respect mine. No, it's like learning how to say Namaste. In order for me to say the sun in me honor suspending you. I first learned how to honor my own son. So I know from that experience of what it feels like to honor my own son. To honor someone else's. The sun in me honors the sun in you, namaste. So we can say you first learn how to respect someone else's will our perception by learning how to respect your own mind know is just as powerful as my guess? Because my wife is just as her nose just as powerful as her. Yes. In fact, the relationship between me and my wife only exists for as long as we both say yes, a woman one of us changes that Yes. And to know that relationship ceases to exist. Which means every relationship I am in, we have romantic view, by family, be it by friendships only exists because two people with a complete free will are saying yes to one another. As soon as I guess turns into a no, it ceases to exist. So from that point of view, I'm a co creator with her. And the same term, I'm a co creator with life, life has all the right to say no to me. I can prepare myself for something I can work really hard for something. But if life says No, they won't be done. If life says yes, which is what we know that's an opportunity. I'm ready for it. So from that point of view, I am the constant in every relationship that I am in. And the only thing I control in all those relationships is myself. I don't control anyone I'm in relationship with. So here's the thing. The only thing that will exist between my wife and I. So that's an example are the things we both say yes to. If she says no to something or I say no to Something it won't be a part of our relationship. The only thing that will exist are the things people mutually say, yes. The word agreement is a word that reflects the action of saying, Yes, that's what an agreement is. So you can say that the fabric of our relationship, as we mutually respect each other, or are based on the things we mutually say yes to one another, with peace and respect. And you won't find anything in our relationship that either one of us that no, you will, you'll find compromises, you'll find agreements. When you love someone set them free. What that means simply means that I don't control their will, or I don't control their perception. They do have every freedom to go in any direction in life. That's to me what that set them free means. Don't try to control or impose their will upon them, because eventually they're going to say no to something you want to say yes to. At that moment, you'll be tempted to cross that line of respect. Because at that moment, we want that Yes. And we try so much to do is that we try to control their will. The only thing that happens just before us, is that mutual agreement. If she says no, respect her, is to respect her being. So I'm gonna still use my words to try to convince her to change her point of view. I'm gonna write an essay, how can I write a review? If she likes the way I see things? She might change that yes, and no. For as long as she says no, if I won't be done. But if I get attached, yes, and I really wanted, that's when I begin that temptation to try to impose my will and subjugate her. You made this mistake, you made that mistake. Let me think for you. That's what gaslighting really is. The ability to control someone else's will by making them doubt themselves to make them doubt Rob capacity to say yes or no. And if they believe you, they subjugate their will this bug imposing and subjugation, every parasite will find his or her perfect close. This looks like peace, but it's not peace is complete lack of respect. Because I this respect her will, and she disrespected her will, because she used my words subjugate herself, because she believed that that's what gaslighting is. But what we normally see is a battle, a battle, who is going to domesticate who who's going to control who, because whoever controls the yes and no other relationship controls the relationship. And that's what we normally see in the world in trying to control it. So from that point of view, whoever's afraid of the know, who is afraid of not getting what they want, is going to be the one who's trying to control others, you can say, that's when we become parasites, or active domestic haters are conditioned, people conditioned someone to go against themselves, especially myself that can't feel right to not have. So from that point of view, that is where the moment of clarity comes in. One of my favorite quotes is from Eleanor Roosevelt, the first day, no one can make you feel inferior without your consent. To paraphrase it, no one can make me feel inferior without my consent. No one can condition me or domesticate me without my consent. How do we give consent, by believing it, by believing that judgment by believing those things, it's kind of like the image of Siddhartha, when Siddhartha faces Mara. And it does not give into temptation of the three daughters, Mara gets so mad and angry that he sends his armies to destroy, see that, and they suit their aerosol, see that looks at those arrows and turns them into roses. I do not give you permission to hurt. I don't, I'm not giving those eras permission to make me feel inferior. He did not get into the illusion. You can say from that point, he faced Mara, which is his own reflection, the distortion of his own reflection, and became the Buddha. In our life, you can say life is constantly happening. There are 7.5 billion human beings living life at this very moment, all with free will, whether they know it or not. There, yes, in there, no. Some of them will have subjugated some of those conditions. Some of them, they know what they're doing, but 7.5 billion people, and our relationship with all of them will be unique to each individual that we are in because I'm the constant. And here's the thing. I don't control the will of another individual justice. I don't control their perception. What do I control? myself. I control my will to control my perception, and once I realized that is about regaining control, regaining that ability to make a choice, regaining that ability to take responsibility and empower myself with my yes and my No, to respect my No, just as much as I respect my Yes, to respect this body, the respect is being and to heal, to heal from the wounds, that conditional love left my heart because I realized that all those wounds are making me react. And I'm reacting with that anger, and I'm trying to impose my will upon someone else. And that's where the nightmare continues. So if I want that nightmare to end, it starts within me, because that's what I control. That's what I that's my contribution. So from that point of view, once I begin to heal, and the best way to let go of conditional love, is to forgive ourselves for ever saying yes to in the first place, connect the image of Siddhartha forgiving himself for allowing one arrow to hit its target. And the only reason why the arrow hit is because he believed. But now that he becomes aware of it, He forgives himself. I forgive myself for believing it, I forgive myself, so that you can say this is not learning how to not take things personal. But I assume that the behavior of another is not because of me. Because I don't control their will. I don't control their perception data. And that's what I mean by that. The respect that every individual sees, like, as unique as they are, and express their choices, as unique as they are. But what I can control is this, if I am the constant in every relationship that I am in, if I already have that disturbance, that that relationship that is in disharmony, then I'm always going to be the constant for disharmony in every relationship, because that's all I can give. Whenever I begin to do the work, of healing, of letting go of unlearning that which doesn't lead me to heal. And I get to the point where I'm at peace with myself, that I master myself. And what I mean by mastering is simply that I put into practice, everything I've learned to heal, and accept myself. That's what I mean by Master, I stop pretending to be something I am not an accept myself for who I am, the sum of every choice that I've ever made, and the youngest I will ever be. When I get to that point, when I'm at peace with myself, when I've forgiven myself, that peace becomes the constant opportunity with every relationship that I am in, because I can't give what I do not have. Once that relationship changes, my relationship with each one changes. That doesn't mean I'm going to change them. Some people still see me as that high school kid, there's people who still see my father, as Dr. Michael Reese, they still have wounds with him from when we did some time when he was 18, or 23 years old. And one of my favorite, my one of my favorite examples of that is that me, my me and my wife, were talking to one of my uncles and my aunts. And we were having my first adult conversation because my uncle, my aunt and my uncle, were talking to me as an as a peer as opposed to a nephew. We were talking about life. And at one point, my uncle said, we go, there's a great book that's out there, that's great for couples score, the Four Agreements, you should read it, don't listen to your dad, but read the book. The reason why my uncle said that is that my my uncle still has a memory of who my father used to be a long time ago. And sometimes people will still see you for who you are. Is it something that most addicts or alcoholics go through? You know, it's like they, they have their their aha moment. They have a moment of clarity. They go through the process, when they go back to their world, and to reengage the community, their family, there'll be people who were given the opportunity, the benefit of doubt who they are now. And then there'll be those people who still have those old wounds that don't trust it. And some people who are well, that's what you think, but I know you're going to relax and once you relapse, I know you're wrong. And I and that kind of thing. Someone who goes through that is dealing with people who remember who they were and they still want to project that old image and you have people who will see you for who you are If you can't control it kind of like the nature of the question, there's things in life, we can control that happen. When I do control is how I respond to that, how I react to that, how I let it be something that I will use to reinforce whatever doubt I have. Or I will use it to learn from, like, one of my favorite examples of how not to take it personal is like, imagine me when I'm younger, and I used to be really afraid of talking to girls and ask them out, you know, I'm afraid of the rejection, right? You go ask and they say no. And you feel terrible, you feel horrible. As time progressed, and I look back. The reason why effort is because I'm using their words to reinforce what ever insecurity I already had. If I actually had respect for them, at the time, is there no, they're sharing their truth with me? They're telling me I am not their preference. They're not into me like burger from sex. And city says, He's not that into you. It's the truth. They're sharing their truth. I am not their type. And they're saying the truth. How I'm receiving that, or I'm ugly, I'm fat and this and that. I'm reinforcing whatever insecurity I have. So you can say it from that point of view. They have every right to say no, no means no. But I take it personally, because now I'm going to use that No, to reinforce whatever insecurity I have of myself, whatever judgment I have of myself, and just say I'm not worthy of love, because this and then she just proved it had nothing to do with her. All she did was say her truth. Looking back, I realized that that's what I was doing. That's what really hurt about that, that my move I tied, who I am based on someone else's point of view. And she said yes, I'm more confident, feel good. She said no. No, to the floors. And it took me some a long time to realize, is there just one to do and then I translated that to work. I just translated that to two relationships, or other things in life, you know, getting rejected from a job offer. I'm so qualified, yes. But the person who was doing the interview has to look for not just the quality of your work, but will you be a good fit with my team? That's the kind of thing or someone who's doing a ever audition for a film? I'm a great actor, why the candidate say no, because they're looking at the chemistry of not just you, but the whole cast and how they flow together. It's not personal, they're just looking for this thing that hits. So from that point of view, you know, as if an actor comes to that, it's like, I know that I'm good. I can use that know, from that rehearsal to make me feel inferior. Or just simply say, I wasn't there for it, that's fine. I'll find for something that does. So going back to that question. Yes, tragedies happen. Accidents happen. Life has us know, people say this, people say that. How am I going to respond to that? How am I going to interact? What's my contribution to all that? And that's what I mean that we control this unique individual that is me. What do I contribute to the community? Well, I contribute what I have, if I have disharmony, sure, tumultuous relationships, unbalanced and things like that. Or I start with respect. Because I have that respect for myself, and I have respect for other people. And if this opportunity doesn't arise, I will still continue to do my work until I assess yesterday.

Alex Ferrari 34:08
Now, let me ask you, you mentioned something in your last answer, which was about letting go of the person, you when people come into your life, sometimes you look at them as who they were 20 years ago, not who they are currently. Do you have any suggestions on how to let go of anger or pain that someone else has done to you? Maybe 20 years ago, maybe 30 years ago, and you still won't let go of who that person is, I mean, to the point where the person that's in front of you might be sick, might be incapable of giving you what you want in life, like the apology or a recognition or anything like that. So now you've lost that opportunity. To even be able to confront the person about the pain that they've caused you. How can you personally let your let that go. So it doesn't affect your, your day to day life?

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 35:12
Well, it all comes down to forgiveness, any process, and worked with one thus reaches that one pivotal moment of forgiveness. If you're not ready to forgive, that's fine. That's your truth. I'm not ready to forgive, I have this wound and it's there. But if you're ready to let go of it, forgiveness is key. Now, I'm going to use the description of forgiveness. As someone taught me. This is not mine, someone else started and I'm just saying it because it's beautiful. Forgiveness is the moment you no longer wish the past was any different. In just a moment you accept it, and you let it go. That's what forgiveness is, in a way from that is the moment you realize that you can't you can't go back in the past and change it yes or no or No to Yes, because life no longer exists in the past. In fact, the past only exists in your memory. And it probably didn't happen the way you think it happened. But the wound is there. And that's the thing about the past, it only exists in our mind as a memory, just like the future only exists in our imagination with what is the only thing that exists without my mind is this present moment. So it's the moment you realize I can't go back there and change things is a woman where it happens. Now, the second part of that expression, you accept it, and you let it go, I'm going to use my brother process analogy or metaphor of a scorpion that has decided to no longer sting itself, with its own tail, administering the poison that are meant for someone else, onto itself. And what I mean by that is that imagine a scorpion. Imagine us like a scorpion, that every time we think of the past of that moment of that person or that whatever, we're singing ourselves again, and again and again and again, with our own tail, as ministering to ourselves, that emotional poison that we meant for someone else. But we're doing we're drinking in ourselves, because we keep hitting it, we keep feeling it. And it impacts us we It makes our life feels horrible. It's just we feel the pain all over again. Again, and again. And again. And again. The moment you accept it, and you let it go, is basically the moment I no longer sting myself with my own emotional poisons. Someone said to me, yeah, but scorpions don't do that. Exactly. Scorpions actually don't do that. But we do every time we think about it. So it gets to the point, where do you want to continue with it? Usually, when I when I say Are you ready to forgive if you're not ready, because you're still using this poison? Because sometimes we've identified ourselves with it. Sometimes it fuels our anger, which makes us think that we are powerful, but we're not we it's just a crutch. But it still hurts. So the question comes really comes in is, are you ready to let go of the hurt if you are taking a step forward, and using the full spectrum of everything humanity has created from therapists from a cognitive behavioral therapist, to whatever it is medications Ayahuasca or, or processing or talking or healing or talking to your priest or minister, your rabbi. There's so many packs that can take you just have to find the one that resonates with you. But ultimately, it comes down to that moment of acceptance. I can't go back in the pass and change yourlife no longer is there. So I want to continue to hurt myself with

Mind you it doesn't mean that I'm not going to learn from it. Of course, I'm going to learn from it. When am I going to continue to drink that emotional poison that I've been given myself over and over again, because it's long, but that person gave that initial dosage that's giving me it's me every time I think about it, hitting my own, again again, and I'm creating my own trauma. Even in, there's trauma that was caused by moments, you know, there's the moments where I hydroplane and I almost killed my whole family in a storm in San Diego having tires that didn't have enough thread, you know, so that's the thing about Southern California. lazy about our tires, and when that rain comes, we lose the so every time I feel that sensation of hydroplaning my whole body goes casino thing and that really inept situation but my body has that memory but sometimes PTSD comes from that There's PTSD that comes from an actual wounds and emotional work. Then there's the PTSD that we create from our own. But it's our taking things personal. Either way, whether it came from a real moment, or something we've created. It all comes to an end, when we choose, actually, when we give ourselves permission to heal, and we find that in a resonance, it could be a Toltec tradition, it could be therapy could be, whatever it is, there's so many versions, we just go to the one that resonates with us. And we heal, and we let go, which means I no longer identify myself. With that moment, I will learn from that moment. But I will no longer use it to hurt myself.

Alex Ferrari 41:04
Now, there's so much the inner voice the monkey brain has is has been said, inner voice. So much, it has so much to harm us. Sometimes it beats us up so much. We're so hard on ourselves. I like I forgot who said it, but it says Like if if you had someone in your life who spoke to you, like you speak to yourself, you would never want to be that have that person in your life. It's so so true. So what advice do you have? First of all, the first question is, why do we beat ourselves up so much? What's, what is the purpose? And secondly, how do you tame that inner voice? The negative inner voice?

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 41:51
Okay, so I'll do it the way my father did it with me. When I was young, he would ask me if this is part of my apprenticeship. So I'll share with that. Thank you. My father would say, Miguel, if you're the voice that's think inside your mind. who's listening? I said, I am. Oh, really? You're the one listening now who's talking into your mind when you're thinking? And answered? Oh, yeah. And that's the individual dream, is the ratio between me and me, you can say is my heart, my mind talking to my heart, or left hemisphere, right hemisphere, whichever way metaphor we want to use, but in that inner dialogue, I am the voice that's talking, and I am the one who's listening. It is here that if there's disharmony, though, disharmony everywhere, but if there's harmony there, I'm, I have that constant opportunity for the harmony in relationship I am in that monkey brain. That's a monkey brain is just another word to describe it. The monkey brain is talking. But I'm the one listening, but I am the monkey brain. One reason why does this it used to get beat up. Well, it's because we're used to it, we become masters of it. Someone domesticated us. And we continue to domesticate ourselves. The example I have in my book, the mastery of service that my grandma imagined me at the age of eight. And I'm learning how to assert myself, which means I'm learning how to say yes and no. And it feels powerful to say no, it feels good to say no, because at this point, I'm just doing everything my parents are telling me but now I'm saying no. And here comes my grandma with a bowl of soup and she puts them right in front of me. She goes here you call me her? The soup will make you big and strong. And I go no, but Honey, this simple make your big star like Papa like Superman. Don't you want to be like Popeye? Superman? No. Now at that moment, my grandma's thinking about nutrition. She knows that soup is good for me. So she tries to go into a memory bank and think well work before I got it. Here comes the plane because she grabbed a spoonful of soup and she tries to put in my mouth. No, no, no, I just purse my lips and I got eaten. No, no, no, no, you know, and with every No, I give little and little it stops being about nutrition and little by little starts being about control. She wants that. Yes. So she goes Miko. Don't you know how many kids don't have anything to eat here in Mexico and around the world. And here you are wasting food, honey, it's a sin to exclude the one I don't want to look like a selfish child from my grandmother's eyes. But I really don't want to look like a sinner. So I go Yes, grandma. I'll eat the soup. And I begin to eat the soup. And as I finish my grandma comes over she says That's my good boy. I get the reward. Not only that I want don't want to look like a sinner in her eyes. I don't want to look like a selfish child. But here's the thing ever so innocently. She got me to change that no into a yes. Basically my own wheel got subjugated up I got domesticated Fast Forward 36 years 38 years later, I keep adding forgetting throughout that number later, and I go to a Mexican restaurant, and they give me a plate this big of food, or at least they call it Mexican food. And through my body calls me the truth, I am full. I'm satisfied. I can eat another bite. But I believe conscious or subconscious says, and I hear that voice. It's a sin to waste food. Yeah. conscious or subconscious. I say, Yes, grandma. And I continue to eat, and I polish that plate, and I'm so struggling after Romeo. But in that moment of clarity, where my body told me the truth, that I'm fully that I'm satisfied, I believe, overruled me. And I went against myself as I continue to do it. In a subconscious, what makes it subconscious is that we've done it so many times, we no longer think about it, it becomes an automatic action, or reaction. I've mastered this condition. Don't be a sinner, don't waste food. Now, here's the thing, my grandma is nowhere around. In fact, my grandma passed away in 2008. But I can still hear it. And the reason why is because we humans, as far as we know, are the only beings that are able to self domesticate, when we domesticate a dog, or a cat. So cat semester case number, my dogs have to be actively domesticating that. But if they ever get out and go out in the wild, they go back to being what they always work dogs in order for them to survive. They'll return some trauma here or there that domestication. But by and large, they'll go back to being what they were, we humans, when our active domesticate or condition of people who conditioned us stop doing that, when we mean the last time, they physically actively said anything, we continue to domesticate ourselves, it's in their voice. But the monkey mind, take some many voices of every domesticated in our life. But it's been me, my in this case, my grandmother only said that to me, once in my life when I was eight, I've been telling it to myself, over and over again, 38 years. So you can say, and I'm going to make the assumption that the vast majority of us have that monkey mind being so hard on us, there's probably more, but I'm going to use this example is that we've gotten used to it, we continued to believe whoever judged us, whoever criticized us, we can do to believe those friends who judged us for wearing a certain type of clothes, or making fun of us for listening to certain type of music or not knowing a certain kind of movie or, or voting a certain way or dressing a certain way or not using the word or not identifying yourself in this way. They said that once. But the only reason why it's still in our minds is that we're still believing it. And this here again, once again, Forgiveness comes in forgiving myself for ever saying yes to it in the first place.

Alex Ferrari 48:18
Fantastic answer, sir. It really makes you think about that inner voice and about what why it continues to do it and go again and again. There's so many times in, in our lives that we have difficult times. turmoil, again, just things happening to us. How do you center yourself? In the middle of chaos in the middle of craziness that happening in your life? It could be a million different things. Yeah.

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 48:47
Well, I can tell you in my life right now, I'm in the middle of trauma. Like I'm in a I'm in a place where my son has autism. He is 16 years old going on 17 And he's going through a bit of a rough patch right now is that he's we've discovered he's getting cluster headaches along with allergies. And the altitude is not up not helping him. So we're going to have to take them to lower but my my daughter is doing phenomenal at school, she is doing great. But to move her now down there would be chaotic for her it will be it will be such a terrible thing. You know, it's like the whole idea of keeping the family together well, okay. Which Which one of my children am I going to sacrifice for that because my daughter is doing phenomenal. She's got her group, she's got she's doing great academically. Then my son. My My wife is going through a little bit of that emotional motional trauma from with my son, you know, it's it's been rough them. My father is about to go into when his heart you know, has some issues with his heart again. He may have to go get another heart transplant. There's another thing with my mom Usually she's starting to show signs of forgetting her memory. My grandmother died. She had Alzheimer's Correct. last 18 years, I'm standing looking at that, like, we're, we're like, if you're gonna have it or not, like is this, this is just the age? Or is this that trauma that, then you have all these things and you're in the middle of it, and you feel like you're going, being pulled in so many directions, because I'm in a stage in my life, where my parents need me. My kids need me, and my wife needs me. Here's the thing in my life, I have no anxiety about me. I'm in complete peace with me. The only the only anxiety I have in my life is about my kids, you know, the parents, you know, I have never felt fear. Like the moment I held my son for the first time in my, in my arms, and realized that, like, I was holding him in my arms, and I was in complete bliss and just in peace, then the thought Sudden Infant Death Syndrome came into my mind

Alex Ferrari 51:03
We all have it.

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 51:06
And I was like, nothing, nothing happened. Nothing happened in the room, I was just holding him. And I felt paralyzing fear. So I have that, you know, I've been working to that. Since Mike, my kids were born, in my sense, almost 17 years old, but I've gotten better with it, but never really goes away. Like you've learned and I've learned to process it, you have that. And there's my wife, and my, my father and my mom are my mom's seven years old. My dad's gonna turn 70 in in in August. And my brothers, you know, they have their families, they're one of the things my aunt just got out of the hospital, I lost five uncles to COVID. And one classmate, one classmate from elementary school. Life happens. It's kind of like the last question, you know, it's like, there's a lot of things that are happening, I can use all of them to feel my anxiety, I can use all of them to make me feel terrible about myself, I can use all of it to make me feel like a victim, I can use all of that to get depressed about things. But if I do, then someone else will need to rescue me. You see, in order to rescue someone who stuck in the mud, let's use this this metaphor or analogy. If someone stuck in the mud, the best way to help them is to stay on solid ground. And extend your hand. If you jump into the mud with them. Now, the only way one can get out is by pushing the other one down and using them to prepare yourself up to take yourself out, right. So jumping into the mud with them, it's not going to help, you have to be able to stay in firm ground. And here's my hand, if you need my help. Because I know you can get out. But uh, here, here's my hand if you need it. That's what compassion is. Pity is thinking pool you you can't do it yourself, let me carry it for you. Let me carry this weight of the world for you. Because I don't think you can do it. That's what PDS I have complete disrespect of you. Because I don't think you can do it, let me do it for you. Compassion is I know you can do it. Here's my hand, if you need help, I'm not going to carry the weight for you. But I'm going to help you with it kind of like spotting at a gym. If you if that analogy is able to help to stay in that solid ground is be able to take care of yourself, to nurture your body to do the work that allows you to find that piece. Remember that to not take things personally is that is not to assume responsibility for someone else's will or perception they are. But here's my hand to help. So as I do this, I'm not the one with autism. My son is not the one going to being a teenage girl. And these times my daughter is not my wife. I'm not my father and my mother and all three of them are going through what their stage in life is. My father, my mother, they're trying to figure out how to be 70 years old and getting to a point where like, they still want to be independent, but they're realizing they need a little bit more help. So they're like, the rules between parent and child is shifting. My mom one day the other day told me Miguel, you're not my father that says I know mom, but I'm here to help you. And she says no, no, no, no, no, no, don't don't that way my independence. Meaning like I was trying to help but my wife and same thing. She is going through her journey. We're in the stage of being parents of teenagers, we're approaching 50s In a few years, what is life. So from that point of view is okay, I can't help anyone. If I sink in the mud or I, I lose myself and my anxiety or depression, I'm going to take care of myself, I'm going to do the things that allow me to have that ability to take care of them. My brother has said loves process metaphors, he comes up with some good ones that this one is phenomenal, is like, imagine you have your scuba diving, and you have only so much oxygen in your tank. So you're constantly monitoring. And when you have what the monitor lets you know how long you can stay underwater, and the monitor will let you know when it's time to start ascending and you have to do it, you have to be smart about it. Because you can go up fast, you're going to get sick, you have to alright, I have to do this kind of like this, and take my time and be able to adapt my body as I go up. Imagine that metaphor, going into family. You know, there are certain people who you react to your emotional body lets you know, basically, it's an oxygen monitor, letting you know how much time you have before you start taking things personal before you react. And at that moment, you take yourself out. But you keep going in. Because they're your family you love. My son, my daughter, my wife, my father, my mom, I love them all. I love them very much, I'm not going to carry the weight for them. But I'm going to do the work that allows me to be with them and help them. So right now, my my son is going to be going down to sea level, my my daughter is going to stay in a school and me and my wife are going to go back and forth to help each other until one of them graduate. One of them graduates, which is probably going to be my daughter in this case, because my son's My God spoke through. So he's 22 and then we'll be able to concentrate on that. But for the meantime, this is what our kids need. And we let go of that obstacle that Allah did allow us to do that. And we allowed ourselves the ability to have put us in a place that allows us to help them. So the world is in chaos.

Alex Ferrari 57:41
Yeah.

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 57:42
And I realized that it's in chaos, because the people I love is that hurricane. So my father always described this, imagine you're the center of the hurricane. If you put all yourself on the outer rims of the of the hurricane or even near the center in the middle, you're gonna get swept away. But if you stay in the center in the eye of the hurricane, where there's peace, you'll be able better able to manage the hurricane. And then I realize the hurricane exists because of me. I'm always at the center of the hurricane. It is up to me whether it's category one or category flash, or just a tropical storm. But the only reason why there is that hurricane is that I'm surrounded by people who are living their own lives. And I've invested in myself emotionally to them. And I can intensify it with my anxiety or I can take it down to category one or even a tropical storm by staying centered by taking care of myself not taking things personal, you know my my son is the perfect teacher for not taking things personal in his blowouts. Even with his when he bites me or he hits me or does this it's not him that's doing it it's physically is blocked, is just That's how he's responding to pain, you know, a cluster headaches that that to describe a cluster headache, like imagine getting an icepick shoved into your eye as you have a brain freeze at the same time. That's how it was right. So imagine all sudden, and they come out of nowhere. So you have this this thing he can't talk. So there's no way out. So he just gets a little aggressive. So we figure it out. We we've changed what we have to do and now that we know we're gonna make the changes. It's that personal. Because when he feels great, he's very loving kid. He's wonderful kid and he's learning how to cope. Am I making excuses for him? My point of view does look like it but from my point of here's basically is the instruments I'm going to use to not take it personal because when he bites, it hurts. emotionally and physically, of course, I still love this kid, and I'm going to teach him consequences. Of course, he's, he's, every time he does this, he gets a consequence. But I'm not gonna say you're a bad kid. We're gonna judge him. Even though like, the anger comes in, and voice comes up, it's like learning how to control your emotion because I don't have autism.

Alex Ferrari 1:00:35
Right!

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 1:00:36
I'm in my place. So how do I stay centered, and I wish I could say that I the storm didn't come, it came. But helping him taking care of him, giving him the chance to heal. It's all about it like today, he had a very bad one. So we in the humanities teachers, okay, well, let's, let's do this. Let's do that. And we put it in any way situation where we don't set him up for failure. So he's still good, like what we did today worked less. So that's just my son, and my daughter, and my wife, and parents, why my parents, then extend that to my other family extended to my responsibilities as an author, or as a lecturer as this that tax, tech tax time just came in went up property taxes are coming. Anyways, the dogs and it's, it's a lot, it's a mitotic. So where do you stay? Where do you stay? Where's your attention? Where? Where? What do you control me? Tips your fingers? Yep, to distinguish the tip of my fingers. And how I engage this, we're talking about how am I going to procreate? Am I going to add to that storm? Or am I going to be able to slowly comic, you know, be there, stay on solid ground, and I can kiss in the mud. And that's where basically you begin to apply everything you've learned. You know, when life gets tough, you applied everything you learn to keep the story moving forward. When life is good, you apply everything you've learned to enjoy it.

Alex Ferrari 1:02:38
There's a concept that I've heard you discuss called Mastering death. So you can be alive. Can you can you answer? Can you kind of dive into that a little bit?

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 1:02:47
Well, it comes from my father, my father and I, when he really began to step up his apprenticeship with me, we were top of the pyramid of the Sun, a very strong experience for me. And at the end of that experience, my heart says, Now go home master death by becoming a life. From that point of view, is realizing that my biggest fear is not death, it's life. And first with death. Every relationship ends. Either by choice, or by life, or by death, my wife and I are together. This little ring of mine only has meaning because we're both saying yes, at the same time. At the moment one of us changes that yes into a no, this just becomes a meaningless object. It just changes for now, thank god. She's saying yes. What any given moment, if I do something stupid, she has every right to change that yes or no. So from that point of view, that's what we know as a breakup. And most of us have experienced that a relationship ended by choice. when a relationship ends by life is the example like I have my college girlfriend. I graduated college, she graduated from college, she went to live back to Berlin, I stayed in California, and these are the days before Facebook or social media. So you know, we just went our ways. We never really broke up. But we just said goodbye at the airport in San Francisco. That's a relationship ended like that. Well, one day my wife and I will see the other one close their eyes for the last time. Here's the thing. That day is not today. Why worry about a day that's going to come it's going to come But today, I'm going to enjoy it. I'm going to enjoy because one day, I'm not going to take this body with. My grandmother taught me that my uncle taught me that when they passed away. Their bodies are there, but they are not there. I am not this body. I'm not this mind. I'm the force that animates it. Where do we go after we? Who knows, I grew up Catholic, which means we believe we all go back to God, for my father's metaphor of imagine that you're a single drop in the ocean, and you live your whole life thinking that you are only this little droplet of water in the ocean. And the moment you pass away, your whole perception expands to that for the whole ocean. That's a beautiful image. But I find that it's the truth when that happens to me. So what happens when I close my eyes? I'm going to go where every single one of my ancestors have gone. Without this not today. Today, I'm alive. My wife is saying yes, my family saying yes. I'm saying yes to this relationship with me. Why wasted with my fear of the what if this is my truth, this is my presence. Let me enjoy it is the thing that allows me not to take for granted, the relationships I'm in, or the person I'm in relationship with. Just like I don't take this body for granted. It's because it's so easy to take it for granted. When we forget about that. It's going to come to an end. Today, I'm the youngest I will ever be. I have my whole life ahead of me, how do I want to live it? How do I want to engage it? And I know I'm the youngest. Because if you take a picture of me right now, in a few years, when I look at it, I'm gonna say look at how young I was, look at how much hair I had. And the reason why I say that is because I look at pictures of someone who took took of me before, and I'm gonna, I'm already saying look at how young I was. I'm young. How do I want to live life? How do I want to gauge it? That's basically the infinite possibility. I can go in any direction in life. And all I require is to say yes to that direction. And if life says yes to me at the same time, awesome. If it says no, then I'll prepare myself when the moment comes when life says yes. So for me, that's what I've learned from that expression. That not let the fear of living get in the way of being able to engage and enjoy what I'm experiencing right now.

Alex Ferrari 1:07:48
Now, can you tell me a little bit about your new book, the mastery of life, a Toltec guide to personal freedom, which I feel that we've discussed a lot of things that will help us with our own mastery, self mastery, but tell me about your new book.

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 1:08:01
Well, it's it's a it's a book that's based on my family's tradition, obviously, I'm I used the structure of cthulhu. In the way it was taught to me that two headed serpent one represents however it does happen and the body of the snake represents the inner journey that we go. We start in health know that moment, we before we have an aha moment, then we have an aha moment, and we start doing the journey. And it takes us all the way to the moment where we have faith about ourselves. It's not the way it's five. I remember Dr. Miguel Ruiz, I remember apprentice me galleries. And I remember Bobby galleries, you can say that to me got to resist one side of the head of the serpent. His journey is the body. And the head is that moment where he comes to peace with himself. Think about putting into effect this is a teacher once told me this. The key to enlightenment is effort. That's it. That's what she said. The key to enlightenment is effort. And I wish I can tell you the name of this teacher, but I forgot but it was the her expression was just packed. Effort is using the energy that animates this body that animates his mind. To make a choice to take a step forward, his being that infinite possibility. You can think of all these things. And if you like one of them, you say yes. That's what effort is. Discipline is remembering to apply that effort every day. That's what discipline is. Forget about the drill sergeant. This is about remembering that I have a choice every day to take that step. Follow through is what success is. So, mastery of life. We're not talking about imposing my will or subjugating something or having power over it's about Practice makes the master because the first time you take that step forward, you realize I can do this. It's like grabbing a lesson like going to taking a piano lesson, getting a guitar lesson going to Tai Chi class or karate class or passing class or art class or whatever you're first starting in a journey of what it is to work in the film industry, what is to be great a radio show, at first, you just gotta take a step forward. And the more you put it more, the more you use that effort in that practice. Confidence comes in, I have the confidence to be able to do it. And the more you practice even more, that confidence turns into trust. You continue to practice it, the more that trust I have in myself to be able to do it turns into faith. I can do this. And that's what we call mastery of life. That's mastery of stuff I put into practice that which I've learned. And I have complete confidence in the ability to use the energy that animates his body and mind to manifest. At first, like yoga, when you first started going to your class, the first few classes can feel could be the first year or two years. Every time you go to your class, you're cranking your neck to see what the teacher instructor is doing. You're doing downward, downward dog or UPS, or baby COVID, or whatever, by your turn your head to a lot. It's just doing kind of like, you're not trusting what you know, you're putting in it like if, if he or she is doing it, you have to reduce completely putting your attention there. But little by little, you get better and better. At Yoga, you recognize the voice, you recognize the sound, you recognize the instruction, and you slowly put your head where it's supposed to be, which is looking down or up or whatever. But just having that line, you're no longer looking at the teacher, you're hearing the teacher, you have the confidence in yourself to recognize what you'll be saying, then you continue to practice it, practice it now. It develops into a trust, oh, I know I can do this. And all sudden you're moving and flowing with what the yogi's teaching, because you have trust in yourself to do it. I trust myself to be that bendy in that position. And then faith comes in. And it comes the moment you actually juice your breath to flow. You're hearing that deep, the yogi but you're already it's just like, it's just like a musical rhythm. You know, it's like, you know, you start the song, and you know where you're the beating, just letting the flow and the beat is the breath. And all sudden, the mind turns off. Because when looking at the yogi, the minds are when you're listening to the yogi, waiting for those instructions your mind is on. But something happens when you finally can come into the breath. Where the mind turns off. For me, it's in running after mile five or four, it used to be mile seven, but mile last mile four or five, I can feel the moment where I no longer am thinking, that little chatter in my head, that little monkey voice shuts up. Because my breath is flowing with my run. The only thing that exists is me by body, the ground and the parse of past tense to keep attention to the cars. But I'm completely in the present moment. They call it a sports zone. I'm in the zone where I don't have to think of what I'm doing. I know what I'm doing. I don't have to rely on the internal dialogue in my mind to let me know what's happening. I know what's happening. I don't need the monkey mind to tell me. I'm present. In yoga, we can say that that is the moment where the whole movement is dictated by the breath and you're in communion. And you have this beautiful experience. And running is the moment where you're in complete communion with your body. And meditation is the moment you're no longer focusing on meditating. you're meditating it's like you Painting, you're no longer thinking about technique. The painting is painting itself, when you're writing a book, who you're writing the script is the moment, the script or the book is writing itself, I'm just just instruct you, I'm just typing away. As a writer that happens, it's a beautiful thing is like, it's like, all of a sudden, like you're you, you spent months, almost years working on the clay working on the clay, it gets to a point where all of a sudden, you're working, working, you're writing, and you're, instead of trying to push it just trying to catch up your fingers, you know, this is writing itself because it you're in the zone. Yeah, that's what the mastery of of life is. I started with confidence became trust became faith, I know what I'm doing. Actually, scratch that. I have faith in what I'm doing, which is 100% Without a doubt.

Alex Ferrari 1:16:00
Now, I'm going to ask you a couple questions to ask all my guests. What is your mission in this life?

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 1:16:06
To enjoy it

Alex Ferrari 1:16:09
And what is the ultimate purpose of life?

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 1:16:13
It feels like the ultimate purpose of life is to manifest. It just manifest and manifest and manifest. In fact, that's how time is it's done with act with action. You can almost say that, if you as we look at Spring, you start life, manifest all this on this video. And it continues over and over. It's just this like, cycle just keeps on going. It's like seeing a fire pit. And the fire just keeps going and you look at the embers flying up, but they're still at the very core of that thing. And yes, one day it'll all dissipate and will no longer burn. But that is that today.

Alex Ferrari 1:17:03
Now where can people find out more about you your work and purchase your new book?

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 1:17:08
Well, you can find me at my website or my father's website. My personal one is miguelruizjr.com, miguelruizjr.com But the family is my father's website which is miguelruiz.com Just Miguel without the Don and the books was you can find us in Amazon and Barnes and Noble and your or your independent bookstore or indiebound.org. But yeah, yeah, we of course we have social media and all those kind of things. Yeah.

Alex Ferrari 1:17:39
Miguel it has been an absolute honor and privilege talking to you today. I know I've learned a lot and I've I felt it in my soul and I hope the audience has as well my friends thank you for all the great work you and your family has been doing over the years and continued success and, and the best of luck with everything you doing my friend. Thank you so much.

Don Miguel Ruiz Jr 1:17:57
Thank you, Alex for the opportunity to share my family's tradition with you and hope everyone has a wonderful time.

 

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